Les Bijoux Indiscrets, or, The Indiscreet ToysDiderot, Denis
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Les Bijoux Indiscrets, or, The Indiscreet Toys
Diderot, Denis
Erotic fiction; Louis XV, King of France, 1710-1774 -- Fiction
"But Zelida, my dear Zelida, do not be in a hurry to die: perhaps,"
said Sophia----"No perhaps shall stop me, I must dye."----"But perhaps
one might"----"One might do nothing, I tell you"----"But speak, my
dear, what might one do?"----"Perhaps one might hinder a Toy from
talking." "Ah! Sophia, you endeavour to comfort me by false hopes,
you deceive me." "No, no, I do not deceive you; only hear me, instead
of distracting yourself like a mad creature. I have heard talk of
Frenicol, Eolipila, gags and muzzles." "Pray, what connexion is there
between Frenicol, Eolipila, muzzles, and the danger which threatens us?
What business has my Toyman here, and what is a muzzle?"
"It is this, my dear. A muzzle is a machine invented by Frenicol,
approved by the academy, and improved by Eolipila, who claims the
honour of the invention." "But pray, this machine invented by
Frenicol, approved by the academy, and improved by that silly fellow
Eolipila."----"Oh! you are of a vivacity that surpasses imagination.
Well then, this machine being applied to a Toy, renders it discreet in
spite of its teeth."----"Can this be true, my dear?" "It is so said."
"We must know it," replied Zelida, "and immediately too."
She rang, one of her women appeared, and she sent for Frenicol. "Why
not for Eolipila?" said Sophia. "Frenicol is less taken notice of,"
answered Zelida.
The Toyman came away with the messenger. "Ah! Frenicol, are you there,"
said Zelida, "you are welcome. Make haste, my friend, to extricate two
women out of cruel anxiety."--"What is the business, ladies? Would you
please to have some rare Toys?"--"No, we have two already, and we would
willingly"--"Part with them, I suppose. Pray, ladies, let me see them,
I will take them, or we will make an exchange."--"You are mistaken,
Mr. Frenicol, we have nothing to truck."--"Well, I understand you,
you have some ear-rings, which you would desire to lose, so as that
your husbands may find them in my shop."----"Not that neither; pray,
Sophia, inform him of the matter." "Frenicol," continued Sophia, "we
want two----What, don't you understand?" "No, madam: how would you
have me understand, when you say nothing?"----"'Tis," said Sophia,
"because when a woman is modest, it gives her pain to speak plain on
certain things." "But yet," replied Frenicol, "she must speak plain. I
am a Toyman, not a Conjuror."----"You must guess however."----"Faith,
ladies, the more I look on ye, the less I comprehend ye. When a lady
is young, rich, and pretty as you are, she is not reduced to artifice:
moreover, I declare sincerely, that I sell them no longer. I have left
the dealing in those baubles to young beginners in the trade."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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