Lessons in Life; A Series of Familiar EssaysHolland, J. G. (Josiah Gilbert)
Philosophy
Lessons in Life; A Series of Familiar Essays
Holland, J. G. (Josiah Gilbert)
Conduct of life
Whatever may be the central idea of the self-constituted elite,
they are always the objects of the envy of a large number of
minds. Silly people "lie awake nights" to get into the best
society. Those who are securely in, of course sleep soundly in
their safety and their self-complacency; and those who are too low
to think of rising to it, and those who do not care for it, go
through the six to ten hours of their slumber "without landing,"
as the North River boatmen say. But a middle class, who range
along the ragged edges of society, know no rest. They sail along
in an uncertain way, like the moon on the border of a cloud--
sometimes in and sometimes out--feeling naked and very much
exposed among the stars, and rather foggy and confused in the
cloud, as if, after all, they did not belong there. It is in this
class that we meet with shying men and shying women. It is in this
class that we find heart-burnings, and jealousies, and envyings,
and sensitive misunderstandings. It is a sort of purgatory through
which the rising man and woman pass to reach the paradise of their
hope, and from which an unhappy soul is never lifted. These people
do not stop to inquire whether they have any sympathy, or any
thing in common with the society which they seek--whether they
would be lost, or whether they would be at home in it. They do not
even seem to suspect that much of that which is called the best
society, is the last society that a sensible, good man should
seek.
Let us suppose that wealth is the central idea of the best
society, and then let the aspirant to this society ask himself
whether he has wealth. Has he a fine house and an elegant turnout?
Does he dress expensively, and is he able to give costly
entertainments? Is he prepared to unite, on a plane of perfect
equality, with those who give the law to this society? If so, it
will not be necessary for him to seek it, for the society will
seek him,--that is, if he be an agreeable man. If he be very rich
indeed, why, it is not necessary that he be agreeable at all. But
suppose literary culture be the central force of this society--has
the aspirant any fitness for, or sympathy with it? Can he meet
those who form this society as an equal, or mingle in it as a
thoroughly sympathetic element? Would he feel happy and at home in
a literary atmosphere? Those questions indicate a legitimate
direction of inquiry, touching every case of this kind. Multitudes
of those who are dissatisfied with their position have nothing in
common with the society to which they aspire, and would be so much
out of place there that they would be very unhappy. My idea, then,
is, that so far as society is concerned, men and women naturally
find their own place. A true gentleman and a genuine gentlewoman,
wherever they may appear, and whoever they may be, are as readily
known as any objects; and really good society recognizes its
affinities for them at once. They do not have to seek for a place,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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