He sed "Apostle Paul couldn't beet it himself." I forgot to tell you that the Kernel calls Ginneral McClellin his Apostle Paul, so you needn't believe enny of the stories in the Abolishin papers about the Kernel and Ginneral McClellin being at logger-heds. Even General Jackson and Mr. Van Buren were never better friends than Linkin and McClellin. Wal, to make a long story short, we got every thing all settled, tho' it took the last night till eenamost mornin before we got thru. I had bent over the tabil so long, lookin at the diaphragms, that I had a stitch in my back, and Linkin was bent eenamost dubil. After it was all over with and every thing had been decided on, ses Linkin, ses he, "Majer, don't you think that that is a capytal stratygim?" Ses I, "Yes, Kernel, that is jest about as nigh rite as you kin get it; but," ses I, "there's one thing you ain't provided for." Ses he, "What's that?" "Wal," ses I, "for a fire in the rear!" "Wal," ses Linkin, "now the Majer is gettin off a joke on us, for thar ain't no chance for a fire in the rear, except it comes from John Bull, and ain't Seward spiked his guns?" "Now," ses I, "Kernel, you ain't as old as I am; ef you was you would see jest what I mean." Ses I, "Don't you know that the Aboleshin papers hate Ginneral McClellan as bad as they do Jeff Davis, and jest as soon as the grand army begins to move they'll expose all his plans, and the rebils will have em all in Richmund in time to defeat em?" "Wal, that is a fact," ses Linkin, "I never thought of that; but they will as sure as preachen do jest what the Majer ses; but what kin we do?" "Wal," ses I, "I'll tell you what to do. Jest let Secketary Stantin issu an order stopping all war news, and put every Aboleshin editer that dares to disobey it into Fort La Fayette. Giv em a dose of their own fisic, and see how they'll like it." When Linkin heard that he jumped rite up, and ses he, "that is jest the checker. These Aboleshinests have bin as much trubble to me as the secesh, and I don't know but a leetle more. I spect I'll have to hang a few on em yet before I can git a settled peece." Then Linkin asked Secketary Stantin what he thought of my idee, and he sed it was jest what was needed, and so Linkin told him to draw up the order and put it thru strong. Wal, so you see how the "Youkase," as sum of our York editors call it, cum to be issued. I see sum of em growled and snarled over it like mad dogs, but it warn't no use. They know now how it feels to be put under the thum screws. So ef you can git the news, jest keep quiet a leetle while and you'll hear music.