Her mother’s last word of counsel was to urge her to be prudent, and to
continue to be a ballet girl. She is, moreover, very discreet, deeply
religious, and it is with reluctance that she refers to her story. Tell
me, please, if it is not infinitely more creditable for this little girl
to lead the life she does, than for you who enjoy the singular good
fortune of an irreproachable environment, and of a temperament of such
refinement that it seems to me to sum up the qualities of an entire
civilisation. I must tell you the truth. I can endure the society of
ignoble people only at rare intervals, and then only because of an
inexhaustible curiosity which I feel for every variety of the human
species. I can never tolerate low society among men. To me there is
something too repulsive in them, especially in our own countrymen. In
Spain, however, I made friends always with the mule-drivers and the
_toreros_. Many a time have I broken bread with people whom an
Englishman would not notice for fear of losing his self-respect. I have
even drunk from the same bottle with a convict. I must admit that there
was no other bottle, and one must drink when he is thirsty. Do not from
this imagine that I have a preference for the rabble. It is simply that
I like to see other manners, other faces, and to hear another language.
The ideas are always the same, and if one eliminates all that is
conventional, I believe that good manners may be found elsewhere than in
a drawing-room of the faubourg Saint Germain. All this is Arabic to you,
and I do not know why I say it.
* * * * *
_August 8._
I have been a long time finishing this letter. My mother has been
extremely ill, and I very anxious. She is now out of danger, and I
trust that in a few days she will be in perfect health. I can not
endure anxiety, and while her life was in danger I was quite daft.
Adieu.
P.S.--The water-colour which I intended for you is not turning out well,
and I am so dissatisfied with it that I shall probably not send it to
you. Do not let this prevent you from sending me the needle-work you
have made for me. Be sure to choose a trustworthy messenger. As a
general rule, never take a woman as a confidante; sooner or later you
will regret it. Learn also that nothing is more common than to do wrong
merely for the pleasure of doing it. Abandon your optimistic ideas, and
realise that we are in this world to struggle and contend with our
fellows. In this connection I will tell you that a learned friend of
mine, who reads hieroglyphics, says that on the Egyptian coffins were
often found these two words, _Life_, _War_; which proves that I have not
invented the maxim just quoted. In hieroglyphics it is expressed thus:
[Illustration: image of an urn and an arm weilding a sword]. The first
character signifies life, and represents, I believe, one of those vases
called _canopes_. The other is a reduced shield, with an arm holding a
lance. There’s science for you!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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