It is related of Hart, a Baptist minister, that he was so good a
preacher and so bad a liver that it was said to him once, "Mr. Hart,
when I hear you in the pulpit, I wish you were never out of it; when I
see you out of it, I wish you were never in it." One Mr. Nicholls, a
Yorkshire clergyman in the days immediately succeeding the Reformation,
who was "much addicted to drinking and company-keeping," used to say to
his companions, "You must not heed me but when I am got three feet above
the earth," that was, into the pulpit. "I have heard of a witty parson,"
says Dr. Beattie, "who having been dismissed for irregularities, used
afterward, in conversation, to say, that he thanked God he was not
cashiered for ignorance and insufficiency, but only for vice and
immorality." Foster, in a note to one of his Essays, refers to a Spanish
story of a village where the devil, having made the people excessively
wicked, was punished by being compelled to assume the appearance and
habit of a friar, and to preach so eloquently, in spite of his internal
repugnance and rage, that the inhabitants were completely reformed.
Cotton Mather has preserved a choice specimen of invective against Dr.
Owen, by one of the primitive Quakers, whose name was Fisher. It was,
says Southey, a species of rhetoric in which they indulged freely, and
exceeded all other sectarians. Fisher addressed him thus: "Thou fiery
fighter and green-headed trumpeter; thou hedgehog and grinning dog; thou
bastard, that tumbled out of the mouth of the Babylonish bawd; thou
mole; thou tinker; thou lizard; thou bell of no metal, but the tone of a
kettle; thou wheelbarrow; thou whirlpool; thou whirligig; oh, thou
firebrand; thou adder and scorpion; thou louse; thou cow-dung; thou
moon-calf; thou ragged tatterdemalion; thou Judas: thou livest in
philosophy and logic, which are of the devil." Mather in turn was alike
severe upon the Quakers. He applied to them such language as "upstart
sect;" "sink of all heresies;" "the grossest collection of blasphemies
and confusions that ever was heard of;" "dangerous villains;"
"choke-weed of Christianity;" "the quaking which distinguished these
poor creatures was a symptom of diabolical possession;" "devil-driven
creatures;" "for pride, and hypocrisy, and hellish reviling against the
painful ministers of Christ, I know no people can match them." "He was a
wise and a good counsellor in Plymouth-colony, who propounded 'that a
law might be made for the Quakers to have their heads shaved.' I
confess," he said, "the punishment was in some sort capital; but it
would have been the best remedy for them; it would have both sham'd and
cur'd them." He quotes some choice language of Penn--"Thou gormandizing
Priest, one of the abominable tribe; thou bane of reason; thou pest, to
be spared of mankind; thou mountebank Priest"--and says, "these are the
very words (I wrong them not!) which they vomit out against the best men
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