"For three days," he resumed, counterfeiting my tone of voice, "for
three days! That would be nothing. The dainty youth will not forsooth,
be roughly treated; it remains to be seen whether he desires to be
courteously entertained. Be converted, be converted, condemned soul!
Fortunate is it for thee that thou art come to this place. THOU WILT
NEVER quit it excepting with the real fruits of repentance! Among these
silent shades canst thou meditate at thy leisure upon the deplorable
state into which thou hast fallen. Woe unto thee, if thou refusest to
listen to the voice of God, who conducts souls into solitude that he
may speak with them." "So saying," he continues, "he abruptly left me. I
remained alone drooping under the weight of a misfortune, which was the
more severe, because totally unexpected. I stood, I know not how long,
in the same position, but on recovering from this lethargy, my first
idea was of flight. But this thought was at once abandoned. There was no
possibility of flight. Without giving a minute account of the manner
in which I passed my wearisome days and nights in this prison, let it
suffice to say that they were spent in listening to sermons preached to
me four times a day by the fathers Giuliani and Rossini, and in the most
gloomy reflections.
"In the mean time the miseries I endured were aggravated by the heat of
the season, the wretchedness of the chamber, scantiness of food, and the
rough severity of those by whom I was occasionally visited. Uncertainty
as to when this imprisonment would be at an end, almost drove me wild,
and the first words I addressed to those who approached me were, 'Have
the kindness to tell me when I shall be permitted to leave this place?'
One replied, 'My son, think of hell.' I interrogated another; the answer
was, 'Think my son, how terrible is the death of the sinner!' I spoke
to a third, to a fourth, and one said to me, 'My son, what will be your
feeling, if, on the day of judgment you find yourself on the left hand
of God?' the other, 'Paradise, my son, Paradise!' No one gave me a
direct answer; their object appeared to be to mistify and confound me.
After the first few days, I began to feel most severely the want of
a change of clothing. Accustomed to cleanliness, I found myself
constrained to wear soiled apparel. * * * For the want of a comb, my
hair became rough and entangled. After the fourth day my portion of food
was diminished; a sign, that they were pressing the siege, that it was
their intention to adopt both assault and blockade--to conquer me by
arms, or induce me to capitulate through hunger. I had been shut up in
this wretched place for thirteen days, when, one day, about noon, the
Father Mislei, the author of all my misery, entered my cell.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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