Life in the sick-room : $b EssaysMartineau, Harriet
Science
Life in the sick-room : $b Essays
Martineau, Harriet
Conduct of life; Sick
in pausing to view and listen to what is going on in all the houses
where one has an interest. By means of that inimitable telescope we
carry about in us, (which acts as well in the pitch-dark night as at
noon, and defies distance and house-walls,) I see in turn a Christmas
tree, with its tapers glittering in a room full of young eyes, or the
games and the dance, or the cozy little party of elderly folk round the
fire or the tea-table; and I hear, not the actual jokes, but the
laughter, and “the sough of words without the sense,” and can catch at
least the soul of the merriment. If I am at ease, I am verily among
them: if not, I am thankful not to be there; and, at all events have,
from life-long association, caught so much of the contagious spirit of
sociability, that, when midnight comes, I lie down with an impression of
its having been an extraordinary day,--a social one, though, (as these
are the days when one is sure _not_ to see one’s doctor,) the face of my
maid is, in reality, the only one that has met my eyes. O yes! on these
marked days, however it may be on ordinary ones, our friends may take
our word for it that we are most cheery alone.
There is one day of the year of which everybody will believe
this,--one’s birthday. Regarded as a birthday usually and naturally is,
in ordinary circumstances, there must be something melancholy in it when
attempted to be kept in the sick-room of a permanent invalid: but this
melancholy is lost when one is alone. It is true, one’s mind goes back
to the festivals of the day in one’s childhood, and to the mantling
feelings of one’s youth, when each birthday brought us a step further
into the world which lay in its gay charms all before us; and we find
the gray hairs and thin hands of to-day form an ugly contrast with the
images conjured up. But, in another view,--a view which can be enjoyed
only in silence and alone,--what a sanctity belongs to these gray hairs
and other tokens of decay! They and the day are each tokens (how dear!)
seals (how distinct!) of promise of our selection for a not distant
admittance to a station whence we may review life and the world to
better advantage than even now. If, with every year of contemplation,
the world appears a more astonishing fact, and life a more noble
mystery, we cannot but be reanimated by the recurrence of every birthday
which draws us up higher into the region of contemplation, and nearer
to the gate within which lies the disclosure of all mysteries which
worthily occupy us now, and doubtless a new series of others adapted to
our then ennobled powers. This is a birthday experience which it
requires leisure and solitude fully to appropriate: and it yet leaves
liberty for the human sympathies which belong to the season. Post time
is looked to for its sure freight of love and pity and good wishes from
a few--or not a few--whose affections keep them even more on the watch
than ourselves for one’s own holy day. Letters are one’s best company on
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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