Life of John Coleridge Patteson : Missionary Bishop of the Melanesian IslandsYonge, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Mary)
Religion
Life of John Coleridge Patteson : Missionary Bishop of the Melanesian Islands
Yonge, Charlotte M. (Charlotte Mary)
Missions -- Melanesia; Patteson, John Coleridge, 1827-1871
'My own dearest Coley,--How many more letters you may receive from me,
God only knows, but, as I think, not many. The iodine fails altogether,
and has produced no effect on the swellings in my throat; on the
contrary, they steadily increase, though not rapidly. Doubtless they
will have their own course, and in some way or other deliver my soul
from the burden of the flesh. Oh! may it by God's mercy be the soul of a
faithful man! Faith and love I think I have, and have long had: but I
am not so sure that I have really repented for my past sins, or only
abandoned them when circumstances had removed almost the temptation
to commit them. Yet I do trust that my repentance has generally been
sincere, and though I may have fallen again, that I may by God's grace
have risen again. I have no assurance that I have fought the good fight
like St. Paul, and that henceforth there is laid up a crown of gold;
yet I have a full and firm hope that I am not beyond the pale of God's
mercy, and that I may have hold of the righteousness of Christ, and may
be partaker of that happiness which he has purchased for His own, by His
atoning blood. No other hope have I; and in all humility I from my heart
feel that any apparent good that I may have done has been His work in me
and not my own. May it please Him that you and I, my dear son, may
meet hereafter, together with all those blessed ones, who have already
departed this life in His faith and fear, in His kingdom above.
'My head aches occasionally, and is not so clear as it used to be....
The next mail will bring us more definite news, if indeed I am not
myself removed before then.... I am afraid that you discern by what I
have written that I am become stupid, and though I could never write
decently, yet you will see that continued dull pain in the head, and
other pains in various parts, have made me altogether heavy and stupid.
I have had the kindest letters and messages from various quarters when
it became known, as it is always very soon, that my health was in a
precarious state: one particularly from the Bishop of Lichfield (all
companions in Old Court, King's, you know) which is very consoling. He
says, If not for such as you, for whom did Christ die? I will not go
on in such strains, for it is of no use. Only do not despair of me, my
beloved Son, and believe me always,
'Your loving Father,
'J. PATTESON.'
'Feniton Court: May 25, 1861.
'O my own dearest Coley,--Almighty God be thanked that He has preserved
my life to hear from you and others of your actual consecration as a
Missionary Bishop of the Holy Catholic Church: and may He enable you
by His grace and the powerful assistance of His Spirit to bring to
His faith and fear very many who have not known Him, and to keep and
preserve in it many others who already profess and call themselves
Christians.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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