London (England) -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Women -- Fiction
"Miss Grig wished me to say that she is engaged for the moment. She was
expecting you earlier in the day. And shall I show you the principal
bedroom? And if you have any orders.... Yes’m,"--following Lilian’s
glance at her trunks piled in the porch--"we’ve got a young man in as
will see to them."
Lilian sat down on an old carved chair with a wooden seat. How
characteristic and horrid of Miss Grig not to be ready to receive her!
Not that she, Lilian, the mistress of the house, needed a reception from
anyone! Certainly not! This notion braced and fortified her. A young
man did appear fussily from the dark basement staircase, and pulled the
trunks one after another within the house. The front door was then
shut. The hall and upward staircase were already gently lighted for the
evening. Beautiful silk shades over the two lamps! Not a very large
house, nor very luxurious! But the carpets, furniture, and pictures had
for Lilian just the peculiar distinction which she had hoped for. They
recalled the illustrations of interiors in _The Studio_ which used to
come every month to Putney; and they were utterly different from the
Putney furniture. Felix! All Felix! No Miss Grig! Impossible that
there should be a trace of Miss Grig anywhere! This interior had been
Felix’s habitation. In a sense it was the history of Felix, his mind,
his taste. She would have to study it, to learn it.
This interior was the first family interior she had seen since Putney.
She was entering it after a period of awful lodging-houses and garish
impersonal hotels. It was touchingly beautiful to her. The baby should
be born in it, should grow up in it, should know it as the home of
memory.... Then it became a vision, a hallucination, and the owning of
it became an illusion. How could she own it? Only yesterday Miss Grig
had thrown her out of Clifford Street with ten days’ wages for a weapon
to fight the whole world with. All that had happened since was untrue
and hadn’t happened.
"I’ll go upstairs," she said coldly to the parlour-maid. She had to be
cold in order to be dignified. Milly Merrislate used to pose like that
sometimes. The resemblance annoyed her, but what could she do in her
weakness against the power of the situation? She did as best she might.
On the first floor the parlourmaid, switching lights off and on, said:
"This is the bathroom and so on."
"Yes. That is Miss Grig’s room," in a hushed voice.
Lilian murmured no affirmative at the face of the shut door; her eyes
had a gleam of cruelty, and involuntarily her hands clenched. The house
began to grow enormous, endless.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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