Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
In 1862 the government needed troops badly, and in each Pennsylvania
county Republicans and Democrats were appointed to assist in the
enrollment, under the State laws. McClure, working day and night at
Harrisburg, saw conscripts coming in at the rate of a thousand a day,
only to fret in idleness against the army red-tape which held them there
instead of sending a regiment a day to the front, as McClure demanded
should be done. The military officer continued to dispatch two companies
a day--leaving the mass of the conscripts to be fed by the contractors.
McClure went to Washington and said to the President, “You must send a
mustering officer to Harrisburg who will do as I say; I can’t stay there
any longer under existing conditions.”
Lincoln sent into another room for Adjutant-General Thomas. “General,”
said he, “what is the highest rank of military officer at Harrisburg?”
“Captain, sir,” said Thomas. “Bring me a commission for an Assistant
Adjutant-General of the United States Army,” said Lincoln.
So Adjutant-General McClure was mustered in, and after that a regiment
a day of boys in blue left Harrisburg for the front. Colonel McClure is
one of the group of great Celt-American editors, which included Medill,
McCullagh and McLean.
“ABE” LINCOLN’S YARNS AND STORIES.
LINCOLN ASKED TO BE SHOT.
Lincoln was, naturally enough, much surprised one day, when a man of
rather forbidding countenance drew a revolver and thrust the weapon
almost into his face. In such circumstances “Abe” at once concluded that
any attempt at debate or argument was a waste of time and words.
“What seems to be the matter?” inquired Lincoln with all the calmness
and self-possession he could muster.
“Well,” replied the stranger, who did not appear at all excited, “some
years ago I swore an oath that if I ever came across an uglier man than
myself I’d shoot him on the spot.”
A feeling of relief evidently took possession of Lincoln at this
rejoinder, as the expression upon his countenance lost all suggestion of
anxiety.
“Shoot me,” he said to the stranger; “for if I am an uglier man than you
I don’t want to live.”
TIME LOST DIDN’T COUNT.
Thurlow Weed, the veteran journalist and politician, once related how,
when he was opposing the claims of Montgomery Blair, who aspired to a
Cabinet appointment, that Mr. Lincoln inquired of Mr. Weed whom he would
recommend, “Henry Winter Davis,” was the response.
“David Davis, I see, has been posting you up on this question,” retorted
Lincoln. “He has Davis on the brain. I think Maryland must be a good
State to move from.”
The President then told a story of a witness in court in a neighboring
county, who, on being asked his age, replied, “Sixty.” Being satisfied
he was much older the question was repeated, and on receiving the same
answer the court admonished the witness, saying, “The court knows you to
be much older than sixty.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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