Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
“One dark night, as he was going out with a friend, he took along a
heavy cane, remarking, good-naturedly: ‘Mother (Mrs. Lincoln) has got a
notion into her head that I shall be assassinated, and to please her I
take a cane when I go over to the War Department at night--when I don’t
forget it.’”
NO KIND TO GET TO HEAVEN ON.
Two ladies from Tennessee called at the White House one day and begged
Mr. Lincoln to release their husbands, who were rebel prisoners at
Johnson’s Island. One of the fair petitioners urged as a reason for the
liberation of her husband that he was a very religious man, and rang the
changes on this pious plea.
“Madam,” said Mr. Lincoln, “you say your husband is a religious man.
Perhaps I am not a good judge of such matters, but in my opinion the
religion that makes men rebel and fight against their government is not
the genuine article; nor is the religion the right sort which reconciles
them to the idea of eating their bread in the sweat of other men’s
faces. It is not the kind to get to heaven on.”
Later, however, the order of release was made, President Lincoln
remarking, with impressive solemnity, that he would expect the ladies
to subdue the rebellious spirit of their husbands, and to that end he
thought it would be well to reform their religion. “True patriotism,”
said he, “is better than the wrong kind of piety.”
THE ONLY REAL PEACEMAKER.
During the Presidential campaign of 1864 much ill-feeling was displayed
by the opposition to President Lincoln. The Democratic managers issued
posters of large dimensions, picturing the Washington Administration as
one determined to rule or ruin the country, while the only salvation for
the United States was the election of McClellan.
We reproduce one of these 1864 campaign posters on this page, the title
of which is, “The True Issue; or ‘That’s What’s the Matter.’”
The dominant idea or purpose of the cartoon-poster was to demonstrate
McClellan’s availability. Lincoln, the Abolitionist, and Davis, the
Secessionist, are pictured as bigots of the worst sort, who were
determined that peace should not be restored to the distracted country,
except upon the lines laid down by them. McClellan, the patriotic
peacemaker, is shown as the man who believed in the preservation of the
Union above all things--a man who had no fads nor vagaries.
This peacemaker, McClellan, standing upon “the War-is-a-failure”
platform, is portrayed as a military chieftain, who would stand no
nonsense; who would compel Mr. Lincoln and Mr. Davis to cease their
quarreling; who would order the soldiers on both sides to quit their
blood-letting and send the combatants back to the farm, workshop and
counting-house; and the man whose election would restore order out of
chaos, and make everything bright and lovely.
THE APPLE WOMAN’S PASS.
One day when President Lincoln was receiving callers a buxom Irish woman
came into the office, and, standing before the President, with her hands
on her hips, said:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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