Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story tellerMcClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
History
Lincoln's yarns and stories : $b A complete collection of the funny and witty anecdotes that made Lincoln famous as America's greatest story teller
McClure, Alexander K. (Alexander Kelly)
Lincoln, Abraham, 1809-1865 -- Anecdotes
“Creswell,” replied Mr. Lincoln, “you make me think of a lot of young
folks who once started out Maying. To reach their destination, they had
to cross a shallow stream, and did so by means of an old flatboat. When
the time came to return, they found to their dismay that the old scow
had disappeared. They were in sore trouble, and thought over all manner
of devices for getting over the water, but without avail.
“After a time, one of the boys proposed that each fellow should pick up
the girl he liked best and wade over with her. The masterly proposition
was carried out, until all that were left upon the island was a little
short chap and a great, long, gothic-built, elderly lady.
“Now, Creswell, you are trying to leave me in the same predicament. You
fellows are all getting your own friends out of this scrape; and you
will succeed in carrying off one after another, until nobody but Jeff
Davis and myself will be left on the island, and then I won’t know what
to do. How should I feel? How should I look, lugging him over?
“I guess the way to avoid such an embarrassing situation is to let them
all out at once.”
He made a somewhat similar illustration at an informal Cabinet meeting,
at which the disposition of Jefferson Davis and other prominent
Confederates was discussed. Each member of the Cabinet gave his
opinion; most of them were for hanging the traitors, or for some severe
punishment. President Lincoln said nothing.
Finally, Joshua F. Speed, his old and confidential friend, who had
been invited to the meeting, said, “I have heard the opinion of your
Ministers, and would like to hear yours.”
“Well, Josh,” replied President Lincoln, “when I was a boy in Indiana,
I went to a neighbor’s house one morning and found a boy of my own size
holding a coon by a string. I asked him what he had and what he was
doing.
“He says, ‘It’s a coon. Dad cotched six last night, and killed all but
this poor little cuss. Dad told me to hold him until he came back, and
I’m afraid he’s going to kill this one too; and oh, “Abe,” I do wish he
would get away!’
“‘Well, why don’t you let him loose?’
“‘That wouldn’t be right; and if I let him go, Dad would give me h--.
But if he got away himself, it would be all right.’
“Now,” said the President, “if Jeff Davis and those other fellows will
only get away, it will be all right. But if we should catch them, and I
should let them go, ‘Dad would give me h--!’”
FATHER OF THE “GREENBACK.”
Don Piatt, a noted journalist of Washington, told the story of the first
proposition to President Lincoln to issue interest-bearing notes as
currency, as follows:
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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