Little Masterpieces of American Wit and Humor, Volume II
General
Little Masterpieces of American Wit and Humor, Volume II
American wit and humor
I have received a present of a pair of Cochin Chinas, a superb cock
and a dun-colored hen. I put them with my other fowls in the cellar,
to protect them for a short time from the severity of the weather. My
Shanghai rooster had for several nights been housed up; for on one
occasion, when the cold was snapping, he was discovered under the lee
of a stone wall, standing on one leg, taking no notice of the approach
of any one, and nearly gone. When brought in, he backed up against
the red-hot kitchen stove, and burned his tail off. Before this he had
no feathers in the rear to speak of, and now he is bobtailed indeed.
Anne sewed upon him a jacket of carpet, and put him in a tea-box for
the night; and it was ludicrous on the next morning to see him lifting
up his head above the square prison-box and crowing lustily to greet
the day. But before breakfast time he had a dreadful fit. He retreated
against the wall, he fell upon his side, he kicked, and he "carried
on"; but when the carpet was taken off he came to himself, and ate corn
with a voracious appetite. His indisposition was, no doubt, occasioned
by a rush of blood to the head from the tightness of the bandages. When
Shanghai and Cochin met together in the cellar, they enacted in that
dusky hole all the barbarities of a profane cockpit. I heard a sound as
if from the tumbling of barrels, followed by a dull, thumping noise,
like spirit-rappings, and went below, where the first object which met
my eye was a mouse creeping along the beam out of an excavation in my
pineapple cheese. As for the fowls, instead of salutation after the
respectful manner of their country--which is expressed thus: Shang
knocks knees to Cochin, bows three times, touches the ground, and makes
obeisance--they were engaged in a bloody fight, unworthy of celestial
poultry. With their heads down, eyes flashing, and red as vipers, and
with a feathery frill or ruffle about their necks, they were leaping
at each other, to see who should hold dominion over the ash-heap. It
put me exactly in mind of two Scythians or two Greeks in America, where
each wished to be considered the only Scythian or only Greek in the
country. A contest or emulation is at all times highly animating and
full of zest, whether two scholars write, two athletes strive, two
boilers strain, or two cocks fight. Every lazy dog in the vicinity is
immediately at hand. I looked on until I saw the Shanghai's peepers
darkened, and his comb streaming with blood. These birds contended for
some days after for preëminence on the lawn, and no flinching could be
observed on either part, although the Shanghai was by one-third the
smaller of the two. At last the latter was thoroughly mortified; his
eyes wavered and wandered vaguely, as he stood opposite the foe; he
turned tail and ran. From that moment he became the veriest coward,
and submitted to every indignity without attempting to resist. He
suffered himself to be chased about the lawn, fled from the Indian
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account