London Lavender : $b An entertainmentLucas, E. V. (Edward Verrall)
General
London Lavender : $b An entertainment
Lucas, E. V. (Edward Verrall)
Humorous stories; London (England) -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction
We had at school a literature master who, in the course of many
hundreds of discourses, made two remarks which have never left me; or
would it not be fairer to say that of the hundreds of lectures which
I heard from a certain literature master I have succeeded in
retaining two injunctions? One was the comment (which he had from
Dr. Johnson) that repetition is a fault rarely committed by bad
writers, and the other, that what we call coincidences should never
be noticed. This being so, I cannot describe as a coincidence the
fact that the young Socialist at Dabney's turns out to be our own
Socialist of the top floor of whose profounder sincerities Mrs. Wiles
is so sceptical. I saw him the next day both enter the house and
leave it, banging the door with a vehemence that would break up any
delicately organized communistic home; and since then we have met in
mutual recognition and have conversed.
Spanton seems to be very much in earnest--a boyish figure of about
twenty-six, clean shaven, but without the soft brown clothes, costly
Jaegerisms, and other external insignia of his kind. On the
contrary, he is a bit of a dandy, uses quite superlative soap, and
has a manicure set. It has been said that nothing is more annoying
than to be agreed with when one is indulging a mood of
self-depreciation. Well, Spanton will never be annoyed that way.
"They're a foolish lot," he said, referring to the company at
Dabney's. "They go there every week just to cackle, and none of them
ever lives at all. Except possibly that blackguard, Rudson-Wayte,
and he ought to be in gaol. But the whole world's like that. All my
friends and acquaintances are either writing or talking or
vegetating. Dabney kindles to excitability every day over something
said in the House, or something said by other journalists about
something said in the House, and that's how he will go on spending
this boon of life to the end--never travelling, never suffering,
never being hungry or thirsty or wicked. What a way to live! And
your novelists and dramatists too"--like so many of the world's
reformers this young man has the most exasperating way of saying
"you" and "your"--"your novelists and dramatists trafficking in the
sham emotions of their puppets, how they are wasting this boon of
life! And all their myriad audiences in the theatres, or readers
reclining on sofas, how they are wasting it!--lulling themselves with
the stories of fictitious mannikins, instead of doing something,
almost no matter what. And this enemy of society who lives under our
very roof, the cinema man, what an account there will be to settle
with him one day! He's one of the worst lullers.
"It infuriates me. Something has got to be done, and I'm going to do
it. England's got to look herself in the face. She's been dodging
the mirror for years, but she's got to do it. I'm out to see that
she does."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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