Lord Ormont and His Aminta — Volume 5 — John Shaqi
Lord Ormont and His Aminta — Volume 5Meredith, George
General
Lord Ormont and His Aminta — Volume 5
Meredith, George
English fiction -- 19th century
'Judge myself worse, then. You had a thousand excuses. I had only my
love of you. There's no judgement against either of us, for us to see,
if I read rightly. We elect to be tried in the courts of the sea-god.
Now we 'll sit and talk it over. The next ten minutes will decide our
destinies.'
His eyes glittered, otherwise he showed the coolness of the man
discussing business; and his blunt soberness refreshed and upheld her, as
a wild burst of passion would not have done.
Side by side, partly facing, they began their interchange.
'You have weighed what you abandon?'
'It weighs little.'
'That may be error. You have to think into the future.'
'My sufferings and experiences are not bad guides.'
'They count. How can you be sure you have all the estimates?'
'Was I ever a wife?'
'You were and are the Countess of Ormont.'
'Not to the world. An unacknowledged wife is a slave, surely.'
'You step down, if you take the step.'
'From what? Once I did desire that station--had an idea it was glorious.
I despise it: or rather the woman who had the desire.'
'But the step down is into the working world.'
'I have means to live humbly. I want no more, except to be taught to
work.'
'So says the minute. Years are before you. You have weighed well, that
you attract?'
She reddened and murmured: 'How small!' Her pout of spite at her
attractions was little simulated.
'Beauty and charm are not small matters. You have the gift, called
fatal. Then--looking right forward--you have faith in the power of
resistance of the woman living alone?'
He had struck at her breast. From her breast she replied.
'Hear this of me. I was persecuted with letters. I read them and did
not destroy them. Perhaps you saved me. Looking back, I see weakness,
nothing worse; but it is a confession.'
'Yes, you have courage. And that comes of a great heart. And therein
lies the danger.'
'Advise me of what is possible to a lonely woman.'
'You have resolved on the loneliness?'
'It means breathing to me.'
'You are able to see that Lord Ormont is a gentleman?'
'A chivalrous gentleman, up to the bounds of his intelligence.'
The bounds of his intelligence closed their four walls in a rapid
narrowing slide on Aminta's mind, and she exclaimed:
'If only to pluck flowers in fields and know their names, I must be free!
I say what one can laugh at, and you are good and don't. Is the
interrogatory exhausted?'
'Aminta, my beloved, if you are free, I claim you.'
'Have you thought--?'
The sense of a dissolving to a fountain quivered through her veins.
'Turn the tables and examine me.'
'But have you thought--oh! I am not the girl you loved. I would go
through death to feel I was, and give you one worthy of you.'
'That means what I won't ask you to speak at present but I must have
proof.'
He held out a hand, and hers was laid in his.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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