They were standing together a last time before his journey. The
carriage had been waiting many minutes. The child was propped upon the
lawn, and Elsie was picking her steps and shaking her paws that met
the dew under the grass. His eye was held over her shoulder to the
weathered door of the stone cottage. It was ajar and coppery brown,
like the walls above the young vines. And over her other shoulder, too,
was the brilliant etheric divide of the sea. He had to go back and
stand a moment in the large room. The wind and the light came in; the
vine tendrils came trailing in. He saw her books, her pictures, her
chair, her door....
He stood beside her again, and tried to tell her how moving these weeks
had been.
“Yes, we have seen both sides, and this was the perfect side. We saw
the other, well----”
“And you are not caught in either--that’s what thrills me most,” said
he. “I am always caught--in hunger and thirst and fear and pain--in
beauty and possessions. But you have stood the same through it
all--ready to come or go, ready for sun or storm----”
“After years of changes and uncertainty, one comes to rely only upon
the true things.”
“I shall want to come back--before the first turn of the road,” he
said. “I think I am hungry for the little house now----”
She put her arms about him. His heart was torn, but there was something
immortal in the moment.
“This shall always be your home,” she said. “You may come back
to-night--to-morrow--in twenty years--this is your house. I shall
be here. I shall teach _him_ to know and welcome you.... We are
different. We are not strangers. We have gone down into the deep ways
together. We shall always know each other, as no one else can, or as we
can know no others. So we must be much to each other--and this is our
home. You will never forget.... Oh, yes, you must come back--just as
you must go away----”
Sentence by sentence, softly, easily spoken; not with a great beauty
of saying, but with a bestowal of the heart that compelled his finest
receptivity. And she had held him as a mother might, or as a sister, or
as a woman who loved him. There was something in her tenure, of all the
loves of earth. He looked deeply into her eyes, but hers was the love
that did not betray itself then in the senses. He could not know, for
he would not trust his own heart.... But this he knew, and was much to
ponder afterward: This which she gave, could not have been given, nor
have been received, before the days of the open boat. So strange was
the ministry of that fasting.
They kissed, and hers so gladly given, failed of the secret; yet
revealed to him a love that sustained, and sent him forth a man--such
as Bellair had not been.
PART SIX
LOT & COMPANY: II
1
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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