London (England) -- Fiction; Love stories; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; May-December romances -- Fiction; Theater -- Fiction
Catherine sat in her chair and dozed. She felt just as old as they made
her. With drowsy wonder she remembered this time yesterday, and the
afternoon at Hampton Court, when she had raced--yes, actually
raced--about the gardens, propelled by Christopher’s firm hand on her
elbow and keeping up with his great strides, laughing, talking, the
blood quick in her veins, the scent of spring in her nostrils, the gay
adoring words of that strange young man in her ears. Mr. Lambton must be
about Christopher’s age, she thought. Yet to Mr. Lambton she was merely
some one, perhaps more accurately something, to be placed carefully in a
chair out of a draught and then left. Which of them was right? It was
most unsettling. Was she the same person to-night as last night? Was she
two persons? If she was only one, which one? Or was she a mere vessel of
receptiveness, a transparent vessel into which other people poured their
view of her, and she instantly reflected the exact colour of their
opinion?
Catherine didn’t like this idea of herself--it seemed to make her
somehow get lost, and she shifted uneasily in her chair. But she didn’t
like anything about herself these days; she was horribly surprised, and
shocked, and confused. After all, one couldn’t get away from the fact
that one was well on in the forties, and supposing that there were
people in the world who did seem able to fall in love with one even
then--silly people, of course; silly, violent people--surely one felt
nothing oneself but a bland and creditable indifference? On the other
hand she didn’t believe she was nearly old enough to be planted among
cushions out of a draught and left. It was very puzzling, and tiresome
too. Here she felt almost rheumatic with age. Last night----
The mere thought of last night woke her up so completely and made her so
angry that she gave the footstool an impatient push with her foot, and
it skidded away along the polished oak floor.
Mr. Lambton looked up from the papers he and Virginia were poring over,
and mildly contemplated the figure by the fire a moment, collecting his
thoughts. Something rather vigorous seemed just to have been done. There
had been a noise, and the footstool was certainly a good way off.
He got up, and went across and replaced it under Catherine’s feet.
‘You’re sure you’re quite comfortable, Mrs. Cumfrit?’ he asked, in much
the same voice with which, when district visiting, he addressed the aged
poor--a hearty, an encouraging, a rather loud voice. ‘You wouldn’t like
another cushion, would you?’
Catherine thanked him, and just to please him and make him feel he was
pleasing her, said she thought another cushion would be very nice
indeed, and let him adjust it with care in what he described, evidently
from his knowledge of where his older parishioners chiefly ached, the
small of her back.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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