Love Among the Lions: A Matrimonial ExperienceAnstey, F.
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Love Among the Lions: A Matrimonial Experience
Anstey, F.
Humorous stories; London (England) -- Fiction; Weddings -- Fiction
Screens of board and canvas hid the auditorium from view, but I was
conscious of a vast multitude on the other side, vociferous and in the
best of humours.
Between the strains of the orchestra and the rattling volleys of
applause, I heard the faint stamping and trampling from the stables,
and, a sound that struck a chill to my heart--the prolonged roar of
exasperation and _ennui_ which could only proceed from a bored lion.
Then there was a rap at the door, which made me start, and Niono burst
in.
"So you've found your way here," he said. "Feeling pretty fit? That's
the ticket! The bride ain't arrived yet, so you've lots of time."
"You've heard nothing from the Home Office yet, I suppose?" I asked.
"Not a word--and, between you and me, I made sure they meant to crab
the show. You've the devil's own luck!"
"I have, indeed," I said, with feeling. "Still, we mustn't be too
sure--they may stop us yet!"
"They may try it on--but our men have got their instructions. If they
_did_ come now, they wouldn't get near the ring till it was all over,
so don't you worry yourself about that."
I said everything seemed to have been admirably arranged. "By the
way," I added, "where have you put the tiger?"
"Do you mean old Rajah?" he said; and I replied that I _did_ mean old
Rajah.
"Why, _he's_ all right--in the cage along with the others--where did
you _suppose_ he'd be--loose?"
"I particularly requested," I explained, "that he might be put
somewhere else during the wedding. Mademoiselle promised that it
should be seen to."
"It's nothing to do with Ma'amsell," he said, huffily; "_she_ don't
give orders here, Ma'amsell don't."
"I mean, she promised to mention the matter to you," I said, more
diplomatically.
"She never said nothing about it to _me_," he replied; "I expect she
forgot."
"I can only say it was extremely careless of her," I said. "The fact
is, I have my doubts whether that tiger is to be trusted."
"Well, you never can trust a tiger same as you can a lion," he
replied, candidly, "so I won't deceive you. But old Rajah ain't so
particular nasty--as tigers go."
"He may not be," I said, "but, in Miss de Castro's interests, I must
beg you to shift him into some other cage till this affair is over. I
can't allow her to run any unnecessary risk."
"I don't say you're wrong," he answered, "I wish I'd known before, I'd
have asked the gov'nor."
[Illustration: "If them two got together, there'd be the doose's
delight."]
"Ask him now," I urged, "surely you can put the tiger back in the
hospital cage for an hour or two."
"The Jaguar's in there," he said; "he was a bit off colour, so we put
him there this morning. And if them two got together, there'd be the
doose's delight!"
"Couldn't you put him somewhere else, then?" I suggested.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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