Love Among the Lions: A Matrimonial ExperienceAnstey, F.
General
Love Among the Lions: A Matrimonial Experience
Anstey, F.
Humorous stories; London (England) -- Fiction; Weddings -- Fiction
The storm of indignation rose to a hurricane when the entire wedding
party filed out of the arena with the officials, doubtless to discuss
the matter in greater privacy.
The stout lady with the feather was particularly annoyed. "Why
shouldn't the two young parties be allowed to please themselves?" she
wanted to know. "It was _their_ wedding, not the Government's. But it
was always the way whenever she came out for a little amusement.
Somethink was bound to go wrong."
Another long interval, during which the wildest disorder reigned
unchecked, the crowd, with the irrationality of an angry mob, actually
throwing pieces of orange-peel at the unoffending lions as the only
creatures within the range of their displeasure. The hubbub was at its
height when Sawkins reappeared and held up his hand for some time in
vain before he could obtain a hearing. Then he addressed the audience
as follows:
"Ladies and Gentlemen," he said, "certain individuals claiming to
represent the Home Office and the London County Council" (here there
were groans, and my neighbour remarked disgustedly, that "that was
what came of returning those Progressives") "have protested against a
wedding in the cage as involving danger to the principal parties
concerned." (Loud cries of "Shame!" and general uproar.) "I have the
honour and pleasure to announce that we have succeeded in convincing
these gentlemen that the proposed ceremony is no more open to
objection than the ordinary performance, and that they have no legal
power to prohibit it. Consequently the marriage will now be celebrated
in the cage of forest-bred African lions, as advertised."
[Illustration: Then he addressed the audience.]
The revulsion of feeling after this most unexpected announcement was
instant and tremendous; all hearts seemed touched with generous
compunction for their uncharitable suspicions, and the hall rang with
tumultuous cheers.
For myself, I could not share the general exhilaration. This
preposterous wedding was permitted after all, and, unless Lurana's
heart failed her at the critical instant, she would inevitably be lost
to me for ever! I might still interpose; indeed I should have done so
at all costs, but for a timely remembrance that no action I took now
would regain her.
She might have been in ignorance before--but in the course of this
delay she must have learnt that I had failed her, she must have
accepted the lion-tamer as a substitute, and, even if I were to
present myself, she would only inform me that my place was already
filled. I had too much spirit to risk a public snub of that kind, so I
stayed where I was. It cannot have fallen to many men's lot to look on
as passive spectators at their own wedding--but what choice had I?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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