Love—Marriage—Birth Control: Being a Speech delivered at the Church Congress at Birmingham, October, 1921Dawson, Bertrand Edward Dawson, Viscount
Religion
Love—Marriage—Birth Control: Being a Speech delivered at the Church Congress at Birmingham, October, 1921
Dawson, Bertrand Edward Dawson, Viscount
Contraception; Sexual ethics
Quite a large family could easily result from quite a few sexual unions.
For the rest the couple should be celibate. Any intercourse not having
procreation as its intention is “sexual union as an end in itself,” and
therefore by inference condemned by the Lambeth Conference.
Think of the facts of life. Let us recall our own love—our marriage,
our honeymoon. Has not sexual union over and over again been the
physical expression of our love without thought or intention of
procreation? Have we all been wrong? Or is it that the Church lacks that
vital contact with the realities of life which accounts for the gulf
between her and the people?
The love envisaged by the Lambeth Conference is an invertebrate joyless
thing—not worth the having. Fortunately it is in contrast to the real
thing as practised by clergy and laity.
Fancy an ardent lover (and what respect have you for a lover who is not
ardent)—the type you would like your daughter to marry—virile,
ambitious, chivalrous—a man who means to work hard and love hard. Fancy
putting before these lovers—eager and expectant of the joys before
them—the Lambeth picture of marriage. Do you expect to gain their
confidence?
They ask for bread; you give them a stone.
ALLEGIANCE OF THE YOUNG.
Authority, and I include under authority the Churches, will never gain
the allegiance of the young unless their attitude is more frank, more
courageous, and more in accordance with realities.
And to tell you the truth, I am not sure that too much prudent
self-restraint suits love and its purport. Romance and deliberate
self-control do not, to my mind, rhyme very well together. A touch of
madness to begin with does no harm. Heaven knows life sobers it soon
enough. If you don’t start life with a head of steam you won’t get far.
Sex love has, apart from parenthood, a purport of its own. It is
something to prize and to cherish for its own sake. It is an essential
part of health and happiness in marriage. And now, if you will allow me,
I will carry this argument a step further.
If sexual union is a gift of God it is worth learning how to use it.
Within its own sphere it should be cultivated so as to bring physical
satisfaction to both, not merely to one. The attainment of mutual and
reciprocal joy in their relations constitutes a firm bond between two
people and makes for durability of their marriage tie.
Reciprocity in sex love is the physical counterpart of sympathy. More
marriages fail from inadequate and clumsy sex love than from too much
sex love.
PASSION A WORTHY POSSESSION.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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