He eyed the men who passed him; and when he came to a saloon he would
push open the door and gaze about. Sometimes he would enter, and hurry
through, to peer into the compartments in the back; and then go out
again, giving a wide berth to the drinkers, and shrinking from their
glances. Once a girl appeared in a doorway, and smiled and nodded to
him; he started and hurried out, shuddering. Her wanton black eyes
haunted him, hinting unimaginable things.
Then, on a corner, he stopped and spoke to a policeman. “Hello!” said
the man, and shook his head--“No, not this time.” So the boy went on;
there were several miles of this Highway, and each block of it the same.
At last, in a dingy bar-room, with saw-dust strewn upon the floor, and
the odor of stale beer and tobacco-smoke in the air--here suddenly the
boy sprang forward, with a cry: “Father!” And a man who sat with bowed
head in a corner gave a start, and lifted a white face and stared at
him. He rose unsteadily to his feet, and staggered to the other, and
fell upon his shoulder, sobbing, “My son! My son!”
How many times had Thyrsis heard those words--in how many hours of
anguish! They sank into the deeps of him, waking echoes like the clang
of a bell: they voiced all the terror and grief of defeated life--“My
son! My son!”
The man clung to him, weeping, and pouring out the flood of his shame.
“I have fallen again--I am lost--I am lost!”
The occupants of the place were watching the scene with dull curiosity;
and the boy was trembling like a wild deer trapped.
“Yes, father, yes! Let us go home.”
“Home--home, my son? Will you take me home? Oh, I couldn’t bear to go!”
“But you must come home.”
“Do you mean that you still love me, son?”
“Yes, father, I still love you. I want to try to help you. Come with
me.”
Then the boy would gaze about and ask, “Where is your hat?”
“Hat, my son? I don’t know. I have lost it.” The boy would see his torn
and mud-stained clothing, and the poor old pitiful face, with the eyes
blood-shot and swollen, and the skin, that had been rosy, and was now
a ghastly, ashen gray. He would choke back his feelings, and grip his
hands to keep himself together.
“Come, father, take my hat, and let us go.”
“No, my son. I don’t need any hat. Nothing can hurt me--I am lost!
Lost!”
So they would go out, arm in arm; and while they made their progress up
the Highway, the man would pour out his remorse, and tell the story of
his weeks of horror.
Then, after a mile or so, he would halt.
“My son!”
“What is it, father?”
“I must stop here, son.”
“Why, father?”
“I must have something to drink.”
“_No_, father!”
“But, my boy, I can’t go on! I can’t walk! You don’t know what I’m
suffering!”
“No, father!”
“I’ve got the money left--I’m not asking you. I’ll come right with
you--on my word of honor I will!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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