I do not, however, believe that this latter class of feelings is ever
roused by nature herself, except where she has been distorted, or in
some way interfered with. Even in her gloomiest and wildest aspects, the
impression she makes upon us is of awe, but never horror; of melancholy,
but never revulsion of pain, in some mysterious way so far transcending
pleasure, as to be, to my thinking, the most exquisite of all such
sensations.
In a half-dreamy, half-pensive mood sat Marion, this dull September
afternoon, in the ugly, dingy old French diligence, intently gazing as
if it fascinated her, on the far stretch of grim, brown waste all round;
the rain dripping and drizzling, and the poor tired horses patiently
splashing on through the mud, now and then encouraged by the queer
outlandish cries of the driver. At last, the girl glanced round at her
companions. Both fast asleep. There was nothing else to do, so she again
betook herself to the window, and yielded to the gloomy fascination of
the moor and the rain. It began, at last, to seem that her whole life
had been spent thus, that everything else was a dream, and the only
realities were the great trackless desert, and the diligence rumbling on
for ever, where to and where from she seemed neither to know nor care.
Then, I suppose, she must have fallen into a doze, or perhaps asleep
outright. However this was, she must have shut her eyes for some time,
for when she next was conscious of using them, all was changed.
Still the wide-stretching moor all round; but no longer brown and grim,
it now appeared a field of lovely shades of colour; for far away at the
horizon, the beautiful sun was setting in many-hued radiance, and the
rain had all cleared away, except a few laggard drops still falling
softly, each a miniature rainbow as it came. Marion watched till the sun
was gone. Then the golden light grew softer and paler, the clouds melted
from crimson and rose, to the faintest blush, and at last all merged in
a silvery greyness, which in its turn gradually deepened again to the
dark, even blue of a cloudless night. And one by one the stars came out,
each in its accustomed place; all the old friends whom Marion had
first learnt to call by name from the windows of the little cottage at
Brackley. Somehow the strangeness and the loneliness seemed to leave her
as she saw them, and a feeling of tranquil happiness stole over her. But
this solitary evening in the old diligence was never forgotten, for
it became to her one of those milestones in life, little noticed in
passing, but plainly seen on looking back.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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