As she said the words there flashed across her mind—or was it some
mocking imp that whispered it?—the remembrance of some other scene, when
this same phrase, “a plain question of right and wrong,” had been used
by herself or another. When was it? Ah yes! Long, long ago, the first
morning in the little house at Altes. She recalled it all perfectly.
The room in which they sat, the position of their chairs. And she heard
Cissy’s voice saying, timidly, “I don’t pretend to be as wise as you,
May, but are you quite sure there is not a plain question of right and
wrong in the matter?” And, to add to her misery, the thought darted into
her mind—what if she had then allowed herself to see it thus? If instead
of acting as she had done to screen him, she had encouraged Harry
bravely to appeal to her father, how different might all have been?
This terrible complication avoided, her life and Ralph’s saved from this
irremediable agony? Could it indeed be that this terrible punishment had
come upon her for this?
Well for us is it, truly, that our sins and mistakes are not judged as
in such times of morbid misery and exaggerated self reproach we are apt
to imagine!
The remembrance of that bygone scene at Altes flashed through Marion’s
mind in an instant, but not too quickly to add its sting to her
suffering. And, half mechanically, she repeated:
“Yes, the old plain question of right and wrong.”
“I know it is,” said Ralph, “and I knew it in my heart when you just now
said it. I was mad, I think, doubly mad. First, to torture you with my
wild, wicked words, and then to turn upon you with my sneers. So I have
come back to you for a moment, just for one little last moment, child,
to ask you to forgive me and say goodbye. Look up at me, dear, and let
me see that you forgive me.”
She looked up at him; looked with her true, clear eyes into his, while
he gazed down on her—oh, with what an agony of earnestness, as if he
would burn her face into his brain for ever!
For a moment neither spoke.
Then he said:
“It is as if one of us were dying, Marion, though that I think would be
easy to bear compared with this. ‘The bitterness of death’ they talk of!
All, they little know! Good-bye, my own true darling. My one love, my
life’s love—goodbye.” And as he said the words he stooped and kissed
her—gently, but long and fervently, on the forehead.
Poor Ralph! It was the first time.
Was it wrong of her to allow it? Those who think so may judge her, and I
for one shall not argue it with them.
She stood with bent head, motionless, staring at the ground, but seeing
nothing. Then she looked up hastily, with eyes for the first time
blinded with burning, slow-coming tears. Tears that bring no relief,
wrung from the sore agony of a bleeding heart.
But he was gone!
And so “the old, old story” was over for ever for these two; as for how
many others, whose suffering is never suspected!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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