that, haven’t we, Julius?—I knew that they would avail me nothing if
Waldo knew the truth. Because I had—gone wrong! That would have been a
shock; it would have meant a storm. But—well, who knows? Perhaps——! But
Arsenio! With Arsenio! They had been great friends, those two; but in
the end—deep down, there was antagonism, aversion. The one despised,
the other felt himself despised. Oh, but I know—look what I’ve been to
them both! And now they were rivals! Through me! All through Venice
Arsenio had never forgotten Waldo—nor what Waldo called him, as I’ve
told you. All through Cragsfoot Waldo never forgot Arsenio. It was
not only Nina who dragged Arsenio in—though she did. Waldo used to
bring in his name—and watch me. He said to me once, in a light way,
‘I suppose you and our friend Monkey had a picturesque flirtation at
Venice—gondolas and concerts on the Grand Canal, and all the rest of
it?’ I laughed and said, ‘Of course we had! But I don’t think I found
Venice any more intoxicating than—well, than Cragsfoot, Waldo.’ That
lifted the cloud from his face. He took it to himself—as I meant him
to; a bit of self-defensive tactics! That was by no means the only time
that he tried to draw me about Arsenio. But he never put a single
question—not one—to Mother. That was against his code, you know.
“There it all was: the charm of Cragsfoot, the desire to please,
comfort, soreness with Arsenio, anger at Nina, liking for Waldo—and the
adventure! I seemed, in the end, to act on an impulse; I suppose that
it was really the outcome of all these things. But it seemed impulse,
and Nina was the direct—I mean, the immediate—cause of it. How I
remember that day!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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