Ludicrous Aspects Of Christianity: A Response To The Challenge Of The Bishop Of ManchesterHolyoake, Austin
Religion
Ludicrous Aspects Of Christianity: A Response To The Challenge Of The Bishop Of Manchester
Holyoake, Austin
Free thought; Philosophy and religion
Jesus is familiarly known by the name of the "meek and lowly," but this
is a title which scarcely seems warranted by the narratives. From
his youth upwards he gave signs of the possession of an imperious
disposition and a vituperative tongue, and he on several occasions
manifested a want of filial affection. His parents went to Jerusalem
every year to the feast of the Passover, and at the age of twelve Jesus
was taken. When the parents returned, the boy remained behind unknown
to them, and they had got a day's journey on their way home before they
missed him. They retraced their steps to Jerusalem in much trouble, and
at last, after three days' search, found the truant comfortably seated
in the temple in the midst of the doctors, holding a learned argument
with them. When his mother saw him she asked him why he had caused them
so much sorrow. Instead of showing any penitence, he pertly answered,
"How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my
Father's business?" And Mary, though she knew he was the son of the Holy
Ghost, had not the slightest idea what he meant.
When he "began to be about thirty years of age," he met with John
Baptist, a strange sort of anchorite, who used to dress in camelshair
and eat locusts and wild honey. From this cynic Jesus learnt much,
especially the habit of calling names. When people presented themselves
to John to be baptised, he greeted them in this loving way--"O
generation of vipers, who hath warned _you_ to flee from the wrath to
come?" Jesus was baptised, and afterwards retailed much that John had
said, especially his abusive phrases. At this ceremony of immersion the
heavens opened to Jesus, and the Spirit of God descended like a dove and
alighted upon him. This Spirit assumes as many shapes as Satan himself,
and altogether appears to be a very curious bird of passage. This
baptism was not a happy thing to Jesus, for immediately afterwards he
was led up of the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted of the Devil,
and he had to fast forty days and forty nights, and afterwards, we are
gravely told, "he was an hungered," which is not a remarkable fact,
seeing that he was a young man of very good appetite. We shall see, as
we get farther on, that his love of eating and drinking was manifested
on many carious occasions. The Old and New Testaments teem with accounts
of feasts and carouses by the chosen of the Lord, and the Lord himself,
to such a degree, that Christianity has not inaptly been termed the
religion of gourmands. Jesus frequently manifests great readiness and
smartness in reply, which is either an answer to the question addressed
to him, or a very clever evasion of it. When the Devil had got Jesus,
he said to him, "If thou be the Son of God, command that these stones be
made bread." The Devil evidently thought that to make something to eat
would be the greatest temptation he could offer him. But Jesus evaded
the task by saying, "It is written that man shall not live by bread
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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