“Dear Sir,--I cannot imagine that such a meeting as you propose would be
agreeable to either of us; certainly the impression my memory retains
of you, forbids me to believe that you would like to see me as I am, and
where I am. If your desire be, however, prompted by any kind thought of
serving me, let me frankly tell you that I am as much beyond the reach
of such kindness as any man can be who lives and breathes in this weary
world. Leave me, therefore, to myself, and forget me.
“I am grateful for your attentions to my boy, but you will understand
why I cannot permit him to revisit you. I am, faithfully yours,
“John H. Luttrell.”
“Well, did I guess aright?” cried Grenfell, as Vyner stood reading the
letter over for the third time; “is his answer what I predicted?”
“Very nearly so,” said the other, as he handed him the letter to read.
“It is even stronger than I looked for; and he begins ‘Dear Sir.’”
“Yes, and I addressed him ‘My dear Luttrell!’”
“Well; all the good sense of the correspondence is on his side; he sees
naturally enough the worse than uselessness of a meeting. How could it
be other than painful?”
“Still, I am very sorry that he should refuse me.”
“Of course you are; it is just the way a fellow in all the vigour of
health walks down the ward of an hospital, and, as he glances at the
hollow cheeks and sunken eyes on either side, fancies how philanthropic
and good he is to come there and look at them. You wanted to go and
stare at this poor devil out of that sentimental egotism. I’m certain
you never suspected it, but there is the secret of your motive, stripped
of all its fine illusions.”
“How ill you think of every one, and with what pleasure you think it!”
“Not a bit. I never suffer myself to be cheated; but it does not amuse
me in the least to unmask the knavery.”
“Now, having read me so truthfully, will you interpret Luttrell a
little?”
“His note does not want a comment. The man has no wish to have his
poverty and degraded condition spied out. He feels something too low for
friendship, and too high for pity; and he shrinks, and very naturally
shrinks, from a scene in which every look he gave, every word he
uttered, every sigh that he could but half smother, would be recalled to
amuse your wife and your sister-in-law when you reached home again.”
“He never imputed anything of the kind to me,” said Vyner, angrily.
“And why not? Are we in our gossiping moments intent upon anything but
being agreeable, not very mindful of private confidences or indiscreet
avowals? We are only bent upon being good recounters, sensation
novelists, always flattering ourselves the while as to the purity of
our motives and the generosity of our judgments, when we throw into
the narrative such words as the ‘poor fellow,’ the ‘dear creature.’ We
forget the while that the description of the prisoner never affects the
body of the indictment.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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