Pity was strong in his heart, notwithstanding his suspicion, he
came forward and looked down upon her kindly. “I am very glad,” he said,
“to see that you are able to get a moment to yourself.”
“Yes,” she said, “Reginald seems more comfortable to-night.”
“Grace,” said John Trevanion, “it is beyond human patience. You ought
not to have all this to bear.”
“Oh, nothing is beyond human patience,” she said, looking up at him
suddenly with a smile. “Never mind, I can bear it very well. After all,
there is no novelty in it to wound me. I have been bearing the same sort
of thing for many years.”
“And you have borne it without a murmur. You are a very wonderful woman,
or--”
“What do you mean? Do you think me a bad one? It would not be wonderful
after all you have heard. But I am not a bad woman, John. I am not
without blame; who is? But I am not what he says. This is mere weakness
to defend myself; but when one has been beaten down all day long by one
perpetual flood like a hailstorm-- What was that? I thought I heard
Reginald’s voice.”
“It was nothing; some of the servants. I am very sorry for you, Grace.
If anything can be done to ease you--”
“Nothing can be done. I think talking does him good; and what is the use
of a man’s wife if not to hear everything he has to say? It diverts the
evil from others, and I hope from himself too. Yes, I do think so; it is
an unpleasant way of working it out, and yet I think, like the modes
they adopt in surgery sometimes, it relieves the system. So let him
talk,” she went on with a sigh. “It will be hard, though, if I am to
lose the support of your good opinion, John.”
To this he made no direct answer, but asked, hurriedly, “What do you
suppose he wants with Charley Blake? Charley specially, not his father,
whom I have more faith in?”
“Something about his will, I suppose. Oh, perhaps not anything of
consequence. He tries to scare me, threatening something--but it is not
for that that I am afraid.”
“We shall be able to do you justice in that point. Of what are you
afraid?”
She rose with a sudden impulse and stood by him in the firelight, almost
as tall as he, and with a certain force of indignation in her which gave
her an air of command and almost grandeur beside the man who suspected
and hesitated. “Nothing!” she said, as if she flung all apprehension
from her. John, whose heart had been turned from her, felt himself
melting against his will. She repeated after a time, more gently, “I
know that if passion can suggest anything it will be done. And he will
not have time to reconsider, to let his better nature--” (here she
paused, and in spite of herself a faint smile, in which there was some
bitterness, passed over her face) “his better nature speak,” she said,
slowly; “therefore I am prepared for everything and fear nothing.”
“This sounds not like courage, but despair.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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