Astonished to find me in so amiable a mood, she requires pressing a
little, and with almost a bitter curve of triumph and disdain about
her lips, she seats herself in the attitude of an idol, raises her
long, dark-colored sleeves, and begins. The first hesitating notes are
murmured faintly and mingle with the music of the insects humming
outside, in the quiet air of the warm and golden twilight. First she
plays slowly, a confused medley of fragments which she does not seem
to remember perfectly, of which one waits for the finish and waits in
vain; while the other girls giggle, inattentive, and regretful of
their interrupted dance. She herself is absent, sulky, as though she
were performing a duty only.
Then by degrees, little by little, it becomes more animated, and the
mousmés begin to listen. Now, tremblingly it grows into a feverish
rapidity, and her gaze has no longer the vacant stare of a doll. Then
the music changes again; in it there is the sighing of the wind, the
hideous laughter of ghouls; tears, heartrending plaints, and her
dilated pupils seem to be directed inwardly in settled gaze on some
indescribable _Japanesery_ within her own soul.
I listen, lying there with eyes half shut, looking out between my
drooping eyelids which are gradually lowering, in involuntary
heaviness, upon the enormous red sun dying away over Nagasaki. I have
a somewhat melancholy feeling that my past life and all other places
in the world are receding from my view and fading away. At this moment
of nightfall I feel almost at home in this corner of Japan, amidst the
gardens of this suburb; I have never had such an impression before.
L.
_September 16th_.
Seven o'clock in the evening. We shall not go down into the town
to-day; but, like good Japanese citizens, remain in our loftly suburb.
In undress uniform we shall go, Yves and I, in a neighborly way, as
far as the fencing gallery, which is only two steps off, just above
our villa, and almost abutting on our fresh and scented garden.
The gallery is closed already and a little mousko seated at the door,
explains with many low bows that we come too late, all the amateurs
are gone; we must come again to-morrow.
The evening is so mild and so fine, that we remain out of doors,
following without any definite purpose the pathway which rises ever
higher and higher, and loses itself at length in the solitary regions
of the mountain among the upper peaks.
For an hour at least we wander on,--an unintended walk,--and finally
find ourselves at a great height commanding an endless perspective
lighted by the last gleams of daylight; we are in a desolate and
mournful spot, in the midst of the little Buddhist cemeteries, which
are scattered over the country in every direction.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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