Governesses -- Fiction; Love stories; New England -- Fiction; Young women -- Fiction
“I can’t, doctor; oh, I can’t!” she sobbed. “I never dreamed of this;
never supposed you could want me for your wife. I’m only a little
girl—only sixteen last October—but I’m so sorry for you, who have been
so kind. If I only could love you as you deserve. I do love you, too;
but not the way you mean. I cannot be your wife; no, doctor, I cannot.”
She was sobbing piteously, and in his concern for her the doctor forgot
somewhat the stunning blow he had received.
“Don’t, Maddy!” he said, drawing her trembling form closely to him.
“Don’t be so distressed. I did not much think you’d tell me yes, and I
was a fool to ask you. I am too old; but, Maddy, Guy is as old as I am.”
The doctor did not know why he said this, unless in the first keenness
of his disappointment there was a satisfaction in telling her that the
objection to his age would apply also to Guy. But it did not affect
Maddy in the least, or give her the slightest inkling of his meaning. He
saw it did not, and the pain was less to bear. Still, he would know
certainly if he had a rival, and he said to her:
“Do you love some one else, Maddy? Is another preferred before me, and
is that the reason why you cannot love me?”
“No,” Maddy answered, through her tears. “There is no one else. Whom
should I love, unless it were you? I know nobody but Mr. Remington.”
That name touched a sore, aching chord in the doctor’s heart, but he
gave no sign of the jealousy, which had troubled him, and for a moment
there was silence in the room; then, as the doctor began to realize that
Maddy had refused him, there awoke within him a more intense desire to
win her than he had ever felt before. He would not give her up without
another effort, and he pleaded again for her love, going over all the
past, and telling of the interest awakened when first she came to him
that April afternoon, almost two years ago; then of the little sick girl
who had grown so into the heart never before affected in the least by
womankind; and lastly, of the beautiful woman, as he called her, sitting
beside him now in all the freshness of her young womanhood. Maddy, as
she listened, felt for him a strange kind of a pity, a wish to do his
bidding if she only could, and why shouldn’t she? Girls had married
those whom they did not love, and been tolerably happy with them too.
Perhaps she could be so with the doctor. There was everything about him
to respect, and much which she could love. Should she try? There was a
great lump in Maddy’s throat as she tried to speak, but it cleared away,
and she said very sadly but very earnestly, too:
“Dr. Holbrook, would you like me to say yes with my lips when all the
time there was something at my heart tugging to answer no?”
This was not at all what Maddy meant to say, but the words were born of
her extreme truthfulness, and the doctor thus learned the nature of the
struggle which he saw was going on.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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