You must look for some espionage; and it is only right that you should be subjected to it. If _your_ mother was lying very sick, and some stranger, having knowledge and strength superior to your own, had to come and care for her, would you not feel that though you were glad to see her, glad she would give your mother the benefit of her superior skill, yet you would wish to consider her a little, to note when she did thus and so; or if she did something you did not understand, could you refrain from asking her why she did it? Be patient, therefore, with the suggestions of the family, after all, though you know the disease and the probable course it will run, the chances for recovery, and what to do in emergency, etc., _they_ know the patient, all her peculiarities, her likes and dislikes, and if you are wise you will get and keep many little hints from those who have cared for her before you came. If she likes milk, will she insist upon tea? Does coffee keep her awake? Does she hate the sight of gruel, or beef-tea? Does she like much sugar in her drinks? All these are little matters of individual taste that you must find out for each patient, and if you have the necessary tact and forethought, you never need ask the patient one question; usually the friends are pleased to be consulted on such small matters, and gladly tell you all you wish to know. To be sure, they generally tell much more than you asked for; but that does not matter, it is better to listen patiently for five minutes to someone's tiresome descriptions than to repulse them, and so lose just so much kindly feeling from the one who wished to talk to you. If the amateur nurse has been doing something actually wrong for the patient, do not tell her so. She did the best she knew how; but say, as pleasantly as you can, "I think perhaps _this_ would make our patient more comfortable," or "The doctor thinks such and such things are not now necessary, and it would be better to do this way." Then you can do what you know to be right, and not hurt the feelings of the one who has preceded you, and, feeling your way carefully, have everything just as it ought to be, and no one's feelings will be hurt, and no one will feel that you are looking down upon their ignorance; and here I would say that in your little confidential talks with the doctor, you could ask him to say a word to the family if they persist in doing what you know to be wrong. Ask him to give you orders before some of them, and that will set _you_ straight in a moment. With tact, that most invaluable gift, you can get on with _almost_ every one, and when you find that there is no such thing as making friends with the family, you can tell the doctor, and he will let you go; but such places are very rare. Let all see that you are thoroughly interested in your patient, and do not hesitate to perform any little kindness that falls in your way for the rest of the family, and you will win all their hearts without a struggle.