the following eloquent address burst forth in a sharp _contralto_ key, "Vhy, Jack! Lord deliver me, Jack! you be all of a lather! And your nose, child, as smutty as a sweep's, from one end to t'other; why what, in the name of mercy, have you been about? Oh! vhy your hands be puxzy, I suppose, and so they have taken all the japanning off Miss Seymour's fan here, I suppose."--"Mother can't ye mind your own business, and leave mine alone," roared the dutiful son, in a voice of thunder, at the same time profiting by the hint he condemned, and again wiping his face.--"Vhy I only tell you for own good, Jacky; but you are grown so copious of late, there's no wenturing to speak a vord, and my advice never makes no oppression on you, else I'd discommend your buttoning your waistcoat; and if you impress that ere wiolent perspiration you're in, I shall have you laid up in a titmouse fever, that's all Jack.--I know it ba'nt the fashion to mind any thing a parent says, now-a-days; but if I vasn't your own mother that bared ye, you'd attend to me, fast enough; though, (continued she, turning to Selina,) Miss Seymour, a vife is another guess matter to a young man; and Jack would make a wery good husband, I'm certain, if you'd but fancy him, though he's not quite so diligent to me as he might be." Meantime, poor Jack, his faculties almost benumbed with his mother's rhetoric, and his own previous exhaustion, had allowed her to proceed without interruption, while he busied himself in buttoning the unfortunate waistcoat, that had called forth her animadversions. But his evil stars still pursued him: in his agitation he also buttoned up the greater part of the very pocket handkerchief which had before been in such constant requisition; one unlucky corner alone escaped; and, as he stood up to help himself to a fresh bottle of _champagne_ that was at some distance, this singular appendage struck his anxious parent with fresh dismay. Her exclamations, at his extraordinary appearance, were too much for the risible muscles of the rest of the company. A universal shout of laughter burst from the whole table. In vain did Mrs. Sullivan roar out, "Button it up, Jack! button it up!" In vain did Jack cast the most indignant glances, not only upon her, but upon the whole company. The laugh was not to be repressed; and, starting up, with a tremendous oath, the unfortunate Webberly rushed out of the room. It may be supposed, Selina did not much regret his absence; and in the following dance, Sedley's inimitable caricature of the whole family amply compensated to her for the trifling mortification their vulgarity had occasioned. To use the language of the Morning Post, "The dancing was continued till a late hour, when the company departed, highly gratified by the splendor of the entertainment, the elegance of the hostess, and the unrivalled charms of her accomplished niece." CHAPTER IX.