After that first love-making in the field they were not lovers again
while they remained in the Wisconsin town although every evening they
went to walk together. After dining at her mother’s house where she had
to pass under the questioning eyes of her sister the school teacher,
also a silent woman, and to withstand a fiery outbreak from her mother
who came to the door to shout questions after her down the street,
Natalie came back along the railroad tracks to find John Webster
waiting for her in the darkness by the office door. Then they walked
boldly through the streets and went into the country and, when they
had got upon a country road, went hand in hand, for the most part in
silence.
* * * * *
And from day to day, in the office and in the Webster household the
feeling of tenseness grew more and more pronounced.
In the house, when he had come in late at night and had crept up to
his room, he had a sense of the fact that both his wife and daughter
were lying awake, thinking of him, wondering about him, wondering
what strange thing had happened to make him suddenly a new man. From
what he had seen in their eyes in the day-time he knew that they had
both became suddenly aware of him. Now he was no longer the mere
bread-winner, the man who goes in and out of his house as a work horse
goes in and out of a stable. Now, as he lay in his bed and behind the
two walls of his room and the two closed doors, voices were awakening
within them, little fearful voices. His mind had got into the habit
of thinking of walls and doors. “Some night the walls will fall down
and the two doors will open. I must be ready for the time when that
happens,” he thought.
His wife was one who, when she was excited, resentful, or angry, sank
herself into an ocean of silence. Perhaps the whole town knew of his
walking about in the evening with Natalie Swartz. Had news of it come
to his wife she would not have spoken of the matter to her daughter.
There would be just a dense kind of silence in the house and the
daughter would know there was something the matter. There had been such
times before. The daughter would have become frightened, perhaps it
would be just at bottom the fear of change, that something was about to
happen that would disturb the steady even passage of days.
One noon, during the second week after the love-making with Natalie, he
walked toward the centre of town, intending to go into a restaurant and
eat lunch, but instead walked straight ahead down the tracks for nearly
a mile. Then, not knowing exactly what impulse had led him, he went
back to the office. Natalie and all the others except the youngest of
the three women had gone out. Perhaps the air of the place had become
so heavy with unexpressed thoughts and feelings that none of them
wanted to stay there when they were not working. The day was bright and
warm, a golden and red Wisconsin day of early October.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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