Margarita's Soul: The Romantic Recollections of a Man of FiftyBacon, Josephine Daskam
General
Margarita's Soul: The Romantic Recollections of a Man of Fifty
Bacon, Josephine Daskam
Fiction
There are, of course, whole pages to be written--if one wanted to
write them--of that night on the rocks. I naturally don't want to
write them. To say that I have not imagined them would be a stupid
lie; I am human. But I have never been able to bring myself to the
point of view of the modern lady novelist in these matters. Why is it,
by the way, that God has hidden so many things in these latter days
from the prudent and revealed them unto spinsters?
Not that I need to rely on my imagination: Margarita would have saved
me that. Once she got the idea that I was interested in those early
days, she was perfectly willing to draw upon her extraordinary memory
for all the details I could endure. But of course I could not let her.
The darling imbecile--could anything have been so hopelessly
enchanting as Margarita? It is impossible. If you can picture to
yourself a boy--but that is misleading, directly, when I think of her
curled close against me on the rocks, her hand on my arm and all my
veins tingling under it. She was all woman. And yet who but me who
knew her can ever have heard from the lips of any woman such absolute
naivete, such crystal frankness? It was like those dear talks with
some lovely, loved and loving child. But that, again, gives you no
proper idea. For no child's throat sounds such deep, bell-like tones,
such sweet, swooping cadences. And no child's eyes meet yours with
that clear beam, only to soften and tremble and swim suddenly with
such alluring tenderness that your heart shakes in you and slips out
to drown contentedly in those slate-blue depths. No, no, there is no
describing Margarita. Perhaps King came nearest to it when he said
that she was Eve before the fall, plus a sense of humour! But Eve is
distinctly Miltonian to us (unfortunately for the poor woman) and
Margarita would have horrified Milton--there is no doubt of it.
Well, well, I left them on the moonlit rocks, and there I had better
leave them, I suppose. It is so hard for me to make you understand
that Roger was incapable of anything low, when I am apparently doing
my best to catalogue actions that can be set only too easily in an
extremely doubtful light. All I can say is, pick out the best fellow
you know, the one you'd rather have to count on, at a pinch, than
another, the one you'd swear to for doing the straight thing and
holding his tongue about it--then give him five feet eleven and a half
inches and blue eyes and you've Roger. This is rather a poor dodge at
character drawing: I know a competent author would never throw
himself on your mercy so.
But then, what does it matter? When the members of a man's own
household, who have known him from boyhood, fail to understand him and
take a satiric pleasure in looking at what he does from the nastiest
possible standpoint (none the less nasty because it is a logically
possible standpoint) why should I, a confessed amateur, hope to make
Roger clear to you if you are determined to misjudge him?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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