England -- Fiction; Love stories; Male friendship -- Fiction; Quakers -- Fiction; Social classes -- Fiction
"Even of that. When you should come to see in me that which is not
lovable you would cease to love me. You would be good to me because
your nature is good; kind to me because your nature is kind. You
would not ill-treat me because you are gentle, noble, and forgiving.
But that would not suffice for me. I should see it in your eye,
despite yourself,--and hear it in your voice, even though you tried
to hide it by occasional softness. I should eat my own heart when I
came to see that you despised your Quaker wife."
"All that is nonsense, Marion."
"My lord!"
"Say the word at once if it has to be said,--so that I may know what
it is that I have to contend with. For you my heart is so full of
love that it seems to be impossible that I should live without you.
If there could be any sympathy I should at once be happy. If there be
none, say so."
"There is none."
"No spark of sympathy in you for me,--for one who loves you so
truly?" When the question was put to her in that guise she could not
quite tell so monstrous a lie as would be needed for an answer fit
for her purpose. "This is a matter, Marion, in which a man has a
right to demand an answer,--to demand a true answer."
"Lord Hampstead, it may be that you should perplex me sorely. It
may be that you should drive me away from you, and to beg you never
to trouble me any further. It may be that you should force me to
remain dumb before you, because that I cannot reply to you in proper
words. But you will never alter my purpose. If you think well of
Marion Fay, take her word when she gives it you. I can never become
your lordship's wife."
"Never?"
"Never! Certainly never!"
"Have you told me why;--all the reason why?"
"I have told you enough, Lord Hampstead."
"By heavens, no! You have not answered me the one question that I
have asked you. You have not given me the only reason which I would
take,--even for a while. Can you love me, Marion?"
"If you loved me you would spare me," she said. Then feeling that
such words utterly betrayed her, she recovered herself, and went to
work with what best eloquence was at her command to cheat him out of
the direct answer which he required. "I think," she said, "you do not
understand the workings of a girl's heart in such a matter. She does
not dare to ask herself about her love, when she knows that loving
would avail her nothing. For what purpose should I inquire into
myself when the object of such inquiry has already been obtained? Why
should I trouble myself to know whether this thing would be a gain to
me or not, when I am well aware that I can never have the gain?"
"Marion, I think you love me." She looked at him and tried to
smile,--tried to utter some half-joking word; and then as she felt
that she could no longer repress her tears, she turned her face from
him, and made no attempt at a reply. "Marion," he said again, "I
think that you love me."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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