Marriage Enrichment Retreats: Story of a Quaker Project — John Shaqi
Marriage Enrichment Retreats: Story of a Quaker ProjectMace, D. R. (David Robert)
Religion
Marriage Enrichment Retreats: Story of a Quaker Project
Mace, D. R. (David Robert)
Marriage counseling; Society of Friends
The project of which they had been a part dates back to the 1968 Rufus
Jones Lecture, _Marriage as Vocation_.[A] The impact of the Lecture and
the weekend following resulted in the Religious Education Committee of
Friends General Conference sponsoring a project to train couples
selected by Yearly Meetings to lead marriage enrichment programs in
their own regions. The first group was trained in 1969, the second in
1971, and, as the majority of them met again the consensus grew that
this project had been sufficiently tested to provide the basis for a
more extensive movement within our fellowship.
A number of concerns emerged that can best be expressed as questions:
Do Friends reaffirm their traditional belief in marriage and
the family as the foundation unit of the Meeting?
Do Friends believe that their mission to spread love and peace
in the world begins with the practice of love and peace in
their own primary relationships?
Are our Meetings doing their utmost to make use of modern
knowledge and experience in the preparation for marriage of
those for whom they accept responsibility?
Are our Meetings satisfied with what they are doing for the
care and support of the marriages of their members, and that
divorces that occur could not have been prevented by any means
that lay in their power?
Would Friends in positions of leadership be willing to
demonstrate their support for this project by participating in
retreats at which they can examine with others the
potentialities for growth of their own marriages?
Those who met at Pendle Hill were not in a position to answer any of
these questions in a definitive way. It is clear that answers would
vary from one Friend to another and from one Meeting to another. They
felt, however, that it would be appropriate and timely for these
questions to be more widely considered. Moreover, their own experiences
of marital growth, resulting from their sharing with other married
couples, had been so rich and rewarding that they felt they had "good
news" to pass on, and were constrained to do so.[B]
THE PLAN
Yearly Meetings throughout the United States were invited to select with
care a married couple for a weekend of training at Pendle Hill, the
Quaker study center near Philadelphia.
During the six months following the training each couple would have the
opportunity to conduct a marriage enrichment retreat arranged by their
Yearly Meeting. Then all the couples would reassemble at Pendle Hill to
share their experiences. The project would be evaluated, and further
action would depend on whatever judgment was reached.
We two were asked to lead the two training weekends. Our decision was to
begin with an actual retreat for the group of couples since this
experience would, in our judgment, provide the best training we could
give them.
PREMISES FROM EARLIER EXPERIENCES
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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