He spoke with an accent of infinite dejection. Arthur could find no
words of reply. If, an hour before, he had been asked what kind of
life came nearest his ideal, perhaps he would have replied, "The
literary life," and he would have instanced Vickars. Now, as he looked
at the writer's tired face, it was as though the naked realities of
such a life lay before him, stripped of all delusive trappings. To
drain one's life-blood into books that no one read, to prophesy to deaf
ears and undiscerning eyes, ah! surely there must be a better way of
life than this; and on the instant he knew what that way was. That
warmth which still pierced his veins spoke to him more clearly than any
voice. To love--that was life. To live the lyric life of love--that
was better than to write of it. And straightway there came to him a
vision of wide plains and deep forests, dotted with the homes of men,
beneath whose roofs lip met lip in faithful kisses, and heart beat to
heart through long nights of sleep, and all the primeval life of man
went on in birth and death, as it had done since the gates of Eden
closed. Ah! infinite desirable delight of love, strong, and natural,
and enduring, on which the great seal of God had always rested! In
that moment he ceased to be a boy; his manhood rushed upon him; he
blushed, and in his heart a voice cried, "Elizabeth!"
She re-entered the room at that moment, carrying a supper-tray, and
Arthur could not but observe the supple poise and grace of her young
figure. She moved easily, with a soft gliding motion; she was dressed
wholly in white, and conveyed an impression of a creature inimitably
virginal. The face had not lost its look of delicate fatigue, but it
was clear that this fatigue was of the mind rather than the body, and
owed itself to no physical defect. Both he and Vickars rose together
to clear a place upon the littered writing-table for the supper-tray,
and in performing this act his hand touched hers. It was but a
feather's touch, but it thrilled him, and his very flesh seemed to
dissolve in a fire of rapture. Again he sought her eyes, but now they
were averted. The moment passed like a chord of music that left the
air vibrating. It seemed to him that all the world must know what had
happened.
Then the current of his life ran back into its normal channels, and he
found himself talking with excited eagerness. The meal was as simple
as a meal could be, but for him it had ambrosial flavours. She sat
quite silent, listening, apparently unaware that he talked for her
alone. Vickars caught the gaiety of his good spirits, and talked as
eagerly as he. The conversation soon found its accustomed
grooves--books, and London, and the interminable comedy and tragedy of
man. Presently Vickars happened to mention a young poet who had lately
died, and Arthur asked if he had known him.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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