Matt: A Story of A CaravanBuchanan, Robert Williams
General
Matt: A Story of A Caravan
Buchanan, Robert Williams
Fiction
“So I am beginning this evening, exactly a fortnight after my first
start from Chester. I purchased the caravan there from a morose
individual with one eye, who had had it built with a view to the
exhibition of a Wild Man of Patagonia, but said Wild Man having taken
it into his head to return to County Cork, where he was born, and the
morose individual having no definite idea of a novelty to take his
place, the caravan came into the market. Having secured this travelling
palace, duly furnished with window-blinds, a piece of carpet, a chair
bedstead, a table, a stove, cooking utensils, not to speak of my own
artistic paraphernalia, I sent over to Mulrany, Co. Mayo, for my old
servant, Tim-na-Chaling, or Tim o’ the Ferry--otherwise Tim Lenney;
and with his assistance, when he arrived, I purchased a strong mare at
Chester Fair. All these preliminaries being settled, we started one
fine morning soon after daybreak, duly bound for explorations along the
macadamized highways and byways of North Wales.
“I am pleased to say that Tim, after he had recovered the first shock
of seeing a peripatetic dwelling-house, took to the idea wonderfully.
‘Sure, it’s just like the ould cabin at home,’ he averred, ‘barrin’
the wheels, and the windies, and the chimley, and the baste to pull
it along;’ and I think the resemblance would have been complete in his
eyes, if there had only been two or three pigs to trot merrily behind
the back door. As for myself, I took to the nomad life as naturally as
if I had never in my life been in a civilized habitation. To be able to
go where one pleased, to dawdle as one pleased, to stop and sleep where
one pleased, was certainly a new sensation. My friends, observing my
sluggish ways, had often compared me to that interesting creature, the
snail; now the resemblance was complete, for I was a snail indeed, with
my house comfortably fixed upon my shoulders, crawling tranquilly along.
“Of course the caravan has its inconveniences. Inside, to quote the
elegant simile of our progenitors, there is scarcely room enough to
swing a cat in; and when my bed is made, and Tim’s hammock is swung just
inside the door, the place forms the tiniest of sleeping-chambers. Then
our cooking arrangements are primitive, and as Tim has no idea whatever
of the culinary art, beyond being able to boil potatoes in their skins,
and make very doubtful ‘stirabout,’ there is a certain want of variety
in our repasts. To break the monotony of this living I endeavour,
whenever we come to a town with a decent hotel in it, to take a square
meal away from home.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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