American literature -- Periodicals; Literature -- Periodicals
Before she had any realizing sense of time, the church had filled again
for high mass. Then the lighting of the great white altar fascinated
her, and she felt an intense desire to live again through such a moment
of assurance as she had lately experienced--to hear that bell ring
again, to smell the incense, and to believe that in some wonderful,
wonderful way it was all a part of that prayer of hers that Heaven was
bound to answer.
So she stayed on, in her far-away pew, to the remotest corner of which
she was crowded as the enormous church filled to its capacity. With the
entrance of the preacher into the pulpit, though, she was conscious of
a distinct "let-down." She had never liked sermons; they dealt with
things so formally. Even when the priests made their greatest efforts
to be plain-spoken and understandable, she seldom got any personal help
from their discourse. They were prone to denunciations of adultery and
drunkenness and other sins of which she was innocent, and to vague
exhortations looking toward a hereafter on which her imagination had
never taken any but the feeblest hold. But what was this priest saying?
Something about a little household that the Lord had loved, and one of
its two sisters had gone astray!
The woman sitting next to Mary nudged her other neighbor and glanced in
the direction of Mary's face, thrust forward as if so as not to lose a
syllable, the tears chasing each other unheeded down its furrows. In
her lap Mary's gnarled hands were clasped in painful intensity.
Over and over, since she was a tiny child in Ireland, she had heard
this Catholic rendering, of Mary of Bethany's story, but it had never
meant anything to her. To-day it meant everything.
[Illustration: "MARY SAT UNHEEDED AND UNHEEDING IN HER DIM CORNER, HER
MIND GRAPPLING WITH THE STUPENDOUS IDEA"]
"An' I said I niver wanted t' see her ag'in if she'd disgraaced me,"
she told herself, and was appalled at the remembrance.
That afternoon, toward the early dusk, she sat in the dark kitchen
holding Annie in her lap; all the other children were out. Casey,
who had not left the house all day, was huddled up to the stove,
smoking his rank pipe; he was unshaven and unwashed, and wore a
coarse undershirt of a peculiar mustard color which lent his pallid,
grime-streaked face a ghastly hue. He had been talking about a "gran'
job" of which a man had told him, and building large castles about
moving to a better street and a better house and buying a "parlie suit
be aisy paymints."
Mary listened believingly; twenty years of listening to these dreams
which never came true had not killed her hopefulness. As she listened,
though, her hopes outran Casey's, for she could conceive no possible
felicity without Angela Ann. How to introduce the now-forbidden subject
of Angela was a problem, but clearly the only way was to plunge in.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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