With an involuntary shudder, I crossed my hands upon my bosom, stretched
my feet upon the mossy bank, and closed my eyes to the fading sunlight,
which I was never to see again. I knew they would lay me in the parlor,
and on my forehead I felt the gentle breeze as it came through the open
window, lifting the folds of the muslin curtain which shaded it.
Throughout the house was a deep hush, and in my mother’s voice there was
a heartbroken tone, which I had never heard before, and which thrilled
me with joy, for it said that I was loved at last. Then I thought how
lonely they would be as day by day went and came, and I came no more
among them. “They will miss the little ugly face,” I said, and on my
cheek my own hot tears fell as I thought how Lizzie would mourn for me
in the dark night time, weeping that I was not by her side, but sleeping
in a narrow coffin, which I hoped would be a handsome one with satin
hangings, as I had seen at the funeral of a rich neighbor’s fair young
bride. I did not want them to strew my pillow with roses as they did
hers—for I knew they would not accord with my thin, plain face. In the
distance I heard the sound of the tolling bell, and I saw the subdued
expression on the faces of my school companions as they listened
breathlessly, counting at last the nine quick strokes, which would tell
to a stranger that ’twas only a child who was gone.
Then came the funeral, the roll of wheels, the tread of many feet, the
hum of voices, the prayer, the hymn, in which I longed to join, but
dared not for appearances’ sake, and then, one by one, they stole up for
a last farewell, lifting my baby brother and bidding him look upon the
sister he would never know save by the grassy mound where they would
tell him she was buried. I knew when Lizzie bent over me by the
convulsive sob and burning kiss which she pressed upon my lips, and
divining her inmost thoughts, I fancied she was wishing that no harsh
word had ever passed between us In my heart I longed to tell her how
freely I forgave her, but ere I had time to do so, she stepped aside,
while an older, a wrinkled hand was laid upon my forehead, and my aged
grandmother murmured, “Poor little Rosa, far better that I should die,
than that she, so young, should be laid in the lonesome grave.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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