Memoirs of Bertha von Suttner: The Records of an Eventful Life (Vol. 2 of 2)Suttner, Bertha von
History
Memoirs of Bertha von Suttner: The Records of an Eventful Life (Vol. 2 of 2)
Suttner, Bertha von
Peace; Suttner, Bertha von, 1843-1914; Women -- Austria -- Biography
Many expressed their pity for us because we were childless. The blessing
of children is, indeed, regarded as the highest happiness; but I have
never expressed in these memoirs one single word of regret for this
lack, nor have we, either of us, ever complained of it. Possibly, if we
had known that good fortune, we should not have been able to comprehend
how such a deprivation can be borne without pain; but it is a fact, our
childlessness never cost us a sigh. I explain this in this way: not only
did we find perfect satisfaction in each other, but that need of living
for the future which lies at the basis of the desire to have offspring
and to work and provide for them was satisfied in our case by our
vocation, which also was striving for the future, and which delighted in
something still in its infancy, but growing and flourishing. Besides, we
had our literary activity, and it is well known and recognized in
popular language that authorship is a kind of paternity (_Autorschaft
ist eine Art Vaterschaft_).
And yet how absolutely different my life had shaped itself from what had
been anticipated in my childhood and youth! I often had at this time
occasion to turn my thoughts back to those days of youth and childhood,
and to refresh my recollections of them. My old Aunt Lotti, Elvira’s
mother, who was now quite alone in the world and had nothing to love
except me, had moved into our neighborhood. She lived about an hour’s
walk from Harmannsdorf, and I used to drive over to see her at least
once a week, and chat with her for an hour or two, on old reminiscences
for the most part. She took the liveliest interest in my domestic
happiness and my labors, and yet we liked best to talk together of times
gone by, of the days when Elvira and I played “puff” together.
Aunt Lotti was really the only link that connected me with my early
life. My brother was still alive, to be sure, but, except for an
exchange of letters once in a great while, we were quite out of touch
with each other. So in these recollections I have had nothing to say of
him. He was an odd fish, living perfectly aloof from mankind and
isolated in a small Dalmatian city, occupying himself with floriculture
and chess. His company consisted of a number of cats. Solitary walks
along the seashore, the reading of botanical and mineralogical works,
were his only passions. I had not seen him since 1872, and up to the
time of his death, which occurred a few years ago, we never met again.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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