War stories, English; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
I, who knew him, as well perhaps as anyone; I, who was privileged to
call him friend, and yet in the hour of his greatest need failed him; I,
to whose lot it has fallen to remove the slur from his name, state this
in no half-hearted way. He deserved it, and a thousand times as much
again. He was the type of man beside whom the ordinary English
gentleman--the so-called white man--looked dirty-grey in comparison. And
yet there came a day when men who had openly fawned on him left the room
when he came in, when whispers of an unsuspected yellow streak in him
began to circulate, when senior subalterns no longer held him up as a
model. Now he is dead: and it has been left to me to vindicate him.
Perchance by so doing I may wipe out a little of the stain of guilt that
lies so heavy on my heart; perchance I may atone, in some small degree,
for my doubts and suspicions; and, perchance too, the whitest man that
ever lived may of his understanding and knowledge, perfected now in the
Great Silence to which he has gone, accept my tardy reparation, and
forgive. It is only yesterday that the document, which explained
everything, came into my hands. It was sent to me sealed, and with it a
short covering letter from a firm of solicitors stating that their
client was dead--killed in France--and that according to his
instructions they were forwarding the enclosed, with the request that I
should make such use of it as I saw fit.
To all those others, who, like myself, doubted, I address these words.
Many have gone under: to them I venture to think everything is now
clear. Maybe they have already met Spud, in the great vast gulfs where
the mists of illusion are rolled away. For those who still live, he has
no abuse--that incomparable sportsman and sahib; no recriminations for
us who ruined his life. He goes farther, and finds excuses for us; God
knows we need them. Here is what he has written. The document is
reproduced exactly as I received it--saving only that I have altered all
names. The man, whom I have called Ginger Bathurst, and everyone else
concerned, will, I think, recognise themselves. And, pour les
autres--let them guess.
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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