Artists -- Fiction; English fiction -- 20th century; Jews -- England -- London -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction
Mendel's nerves had been throbbing in sympathy with his friend, but
suddenly all that place was filled with a soft, clear light and a
bright music, the colour and the scent of flowers, the soft murmur of
flowing water, the whisper of the wind in leafy trees, and his heart
ached and grew big and seemed to burst into a thousand, thousand
rivulets of love, searching out every corner of his senses, cleansing
his eyes, sharpening his hearing, refining every sense, so that the
scene before him--the white tables, the white-aproned waiters, the
green trees, the soft evening sky, the softer reflection of it in the
water--was exquisite and magical and full of a mysterious power that
permeated even Logan's brutal revelation and made it worthy of beauty.
. . . And this mysterious power he knew was love, and she, the girl
for whom it had arisen from the depths, was far away in England,
thinking of him, perhaps, regretting him, perhaps, but knowing nothing
of the beauty she had denied. . . .
Mendel was astonished to find tears in his eyes, trembling on his
lashes, trickling down his cheeks.
"What a baby you are!" said Logan. "You can't have me all to
yourself."
His divination was true. Lacking its true object, Mendel's love had
concentrated upon his friend, with whom he longed to walk freely in
the enchanted world of art, to be as David and Jonathan. Indeed,
Logan's state of torment was to him as a wound got in battle, over
which he gave himself up to lamentation, so single and deep and pure
that it obscured even the impulse of his love. He longed to rid his
friend of this devouring passion that was consuming him and thrusting
in upon his energy, but because his friend called it love, he
respected it and bore with it.
"How good it is, this life out of doors!" exclaimed Logan, lolling
back in his chair.
"I don't know," replied Mendel. "I think it is too deliberate, too
organized. I prefer London streets. There is nothing in the world to
me to compare with London streets. Nature is too beautiful. A tree in
blossom, a garden full of flowers, a round hill with the shadow of the
clouds over them, move me too much. Left alone with them I should go
mad. I must have human nature if I am to live and work. I only want
nature, just as I only want God, through human nature."
"By Jove! you hit the nail on the head sometimes, my boy. That is true
for all of us. It is what I meant when I said that Oliver was a
religion to me."
"I don't mean women or individuals," protested Mendel. "I mean human
nature in the lump. It may be very poor stuff, stupid and foolish and
vulgar, but it is all we've got, and one lives in it and through it."
"That is all very well while you are young," said Logan, "but you have
to individualize it when you are older. One person becomes a point of
contact. You can't just float through humanity like an apparition."
Mendel had lost the thread of his argument, though not his confidence
in its truth.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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