“Charmin' vether this is! Fine hautum mornin's these are!” grinned Mr. Muff (his tongue too big for his mouth, and his teeth too many for his tongue,) with a consequential, self-satisfied air, that seemed to say, “Beat that if you can.” Uncle Timothy coolly remarked that the sun was just out; and Mr. Bosky, that the post was just in. “Ven I began to dress me the vind was nor'-nor'-east, but it soon changed to sow-sow-west,” was the next profound remark volunteered by Mr. Muff. “Then,” said the lauréat, “you and the wind shifted at much about the same time.” The Muffs, Fubsys, and Flumgartens, could not understand a joke, which they always took the wrong way. The intelligent master mason, nothing moved, inquired, Anything new in _Lit-tie Britain?_” “The barber's freshly painted _pole_ * over the way,” replied Mr. Bosky. “Or in _Great Britain?_” continued Mr. Muff. “The _moon_,” rejoined Uncle Timothy. The brother-in-law of Mrs. Flumgarten was at a dead lock. * The barber's pole, one of the popular relics of Merrie England, is still to be seen in some of the old streets of London and in country-towns, painted with its red, blue, and yellow stripes, and surmounted with a gilt acorn. The lute and violin were formerly among the furniture of a barber's shop. He who waited to be trimmed, if of a musical turn, played to the company. The barber himself was a nimble- tongued, pleasant-witted fellow. William Rowley, the dramatist, in “A Search for Money, 1609,” thus describes him:--“As wee were but asking the question, steps me from over the way ( over-listning us) a news-searcher, viz. a barber: he, hoping to at-taine some discourse for his next patient, left his banner of basons swinging in the ayre, and closely eave-drops our conference. The saucie treble-tongu'd knave would insert somewhat of his knowledge (treble-tongu'd I call him, and thus I prove 't: hee has a reasonable mother-tongue, his barber-sur-gions tongue; and a tongue betweene two of his fingers, and from thence proceeds his wit, and 'tis a snapping wit too). Well, sir, he (before he was askt the question,) told us that the wandring knight (Monsier L'Argent) sure was not farre off; for on Saterday- night he was faine to watch till morning to trim some of his followers, and its morning they went away from him betimes. Hee swore hee never clos'd his eyes till hee came to church, and then he slept all sermon-time; but certainly hee is not farre afore, and at yonder taverne (showing us the bush) I doe imagine he has tane a chamber.” In ancient times the barber and the tailor, as news-mongers, divided the crown. The barber not only erected his pole as a sign, but hung his basins upon it by way of ornament.