But the healthy and Christian surroundings of the home to which she came
were not without their influence. Mrs. Varian's sweet endurance of her
life-long suffering, St. John's healthy goodness, and Missy's vigorous
duty-doing, helped her, against her will. St. John was her great object
of interest in life. All her money was to go to him, and she actually
felt compensated for her dull and restricted existence, sometimes, when
she reflected that it swelled, by so many thousand a year, the fortune
that would be his. She had not lost her interest in the world, since she
had him to connect her with it, and to give her an excuse for the
indulgence of ambition. Of course she had been bitterly set against all
the system upon which he had been educated, and would have thwarted it
if she had had the power. His entering the church had been a great trial
to her, but she openly said it was his mother's plan, and no wish of
his, and before he was ordained he would be old enough to see the folly
of it, and to get clear of it. Then came his engagement, and at this she
was wroth indeed, but as it furnished her with liberal weapons against
his disappointed mother, she found her own comfort in it. Now she hoped
Dorla would see the folly of her course; now she could understand what
other people had known all along: simply that she was keeping him in a
false and unhealthy state of religious feeling, that she had forced upon
him duties and aspirations all her own and none of his; that there had
come a reaction, that there was a flat failure when he came to see even
a corner of the world from which she had debarred him. Here he was,
carried away by his infatuation for a woman whom he would have been too
wise to choose if his mother had not tried to make a monk of him, and to
keep him as guileless and ignorant as a girl. Here he was bound to a
woman who would ruin his career, spoil his life for him, spend his
money, disgrace his name; and it was "all the work of his mother." These
were some of the amenities of the family life at Yellowcoats. These were
the certain truths that were spoken of and to Mrs. Varian by her candid
and unprejudiced sister-in-law.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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