England -- Social life and customs -- 20th century -- Fiction; English fiction -- 20th century; Short stories, English
The teams took up their new positions. The whistle sounded. Before Miss
Amherst had disengaged herself from her companion’s inquiries and
counsel, the outside left, amidst erroneous cries of “Off-side!” centred
across to the inside right, who centred again, and James McWinter trapped
the ball, dodged the two backs and shot hard; the goalkeeper fumbled it,
and even supporters of the home side could scarce restrain a cheer. The
other team prepared for a change of tactics, and in exactly four minutes
precisely the same thing happened, and the goalkeeper dealt with the ball
in almost the same manner; tears stood in his eyes; he glanced with
reproach at his gloves, and bowed his head penitently to the observations
of colleagues. Miss Amherst had to apologise more than once when crying
“Shoot!” for kicking the back of a stout gentleman standing just in front
of her. When at the end of the ninety minutes’ traffic the visiting side
had scored five to none, and four of these goals were to be credited to
James McWinter, she turned to her companion. Her father was in a kind of
scrum not far off; she recognised the light in his eyes of one to whom
money was of no consequence, and into her eyes came the light of one
resolved to act promptly. Under cover of the cheering, she made an
enthusiastic and apparently genuine declaration.
“Oh, but, my dear,” cried Mrs. Burnham alarmedly, “you mustn’t talk like
this. This is dreadful. When I said what I did just now, I never meant
you should go and throw yourself away on a great clumsy hulk like that,
earning not more than £4 a week. Besides, his people are meat salesmen.”
“I’m not a vegetarian.”
Mr. Amherst, scarlet, almost blue with eagerness, was hurrying by.
“Not a word, please,” begged the girl, with extravagant signs of
distress, “not a syllable to my father. Promise me you won’t tell him.
My mind’s made up; but I don’t want him to know.”
Mrs. Burnham put out the hooked handle of her umbrella and caught Mr.
Amherst neatly.
“Very sorry,” he panted, “can’t spare a moment.”
“You just come here first,” ordered the lady resolutely. “There’s
something you’ve got to know, and I mean to tell it to you before I go
and look after my husband. I’m not going to be blamed afterwards, and
have you say it was my fault.”
“Do hurry up,” begged Mr. Amherst piteously. “If you knew how urgent it
all was, you wouldn’t chatter on like this. I’m going to give them
whatever they ask for him. He’s a bachelor, and he won’t mind where he
lives.”
“Your daughter,” said Mrs. Burnham, speaking with tragic emphasis, “tells
me—that she’s fallen in love—at first sight—with that six foot
three—called James McSomething—who’s been kicking the ball—like a young
demon—between the two posts. And my advice to you is—keep ’em well
apart—keep ’em hundreds of miles apart from each other!”
* * * * *
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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