Modern Eloquence: Vol III, After-Dinner Speeches P-Z
History
Modern Eloquence: Vol III, After-Dinner Speeches P-Z
Speeches, addresses, etc.
"The 22d! that makes 22,000 men?"
"Yes, I think there are a good many more than that. Wisconsin has sent
about 30,000 men into the war."
Then again came along another regiment from Minnesota.
"Minnesota! My God! where is Minnesota?" [Laughter.] "Minnesota!"
"Minnesota is away up on the sources of the Mississippi River, a
beautiful Territory, too, by the way--a beautiful State."
"A State?"
"Yes; has Senators in Congress; good ones, too. They're very fine
men--very fine troops."
"How many men has she sent to this cruel war?"
"Well, I don't exactly know; somewhere between 10,000 and 20,000 men,
probably. Don't make any difference--all we want." [Laughter.]
"Well," says he, "now we must have been a set of fools to throw down the
gage of battle to a country we didn't know the geography of!" [Laughter
and applause.] "When I went to school that was the Northwest Territory,
and the Northwest Territory--well," says he, "we looked upon that as
away off, and didn't know anything about it. Fact is, we didn't know
anything at all about it."
Said I: "My friend, think of it a moment. Down here in Georgia, one of
the original thirteen States which formed the great Union of this
country, you have stood fast. You have stood fast while the great
Northwest has been growing with a giant's growth. Iowa to-day, my
friend, contains more railroads, more turnpikes, more acres of
cultivated land, more people, more intelligence, more schools, more
colleges--more of everything which constitutes a refined and enlightened
State--than the whole State of Georgia."
"My God," says the man, "it's awful. I didn't dream of that."
"Well," says I, "look here, my friend; I was once a banker, and have
some knowledge of notes, indorsements, and so forth. Did you ever have
anything to do with indorsements?"
Says he: "Yes, I have had my share. I have a factor in Savannah, and I
give my note and he indorses it, and I get the money somehow or other. I
have to pay it in the end out of the crop."
"Well," says I, "now look here. In 1861 the Southern States had
4,000,000 slaves as property, for which the States of Pennsylvania, New
York, Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, and so forth, were indorsers. We were on
the bond. Your slaves were protected by the same law which protects land
and other property. Now, you got mad at them because they didn't think
exactly as you did about religion, and about this thing and t'other
thing; and like a set of fools you first took your bond and drew your
pen through the indorser's names. Do you know what the effect will be?
You will never get paid for those niggers at all." [Laughter.] "They are
gone. They're free men now."
"Well," says he, "we were the greatest set of fools that ever were in
the world." [Laughter.]
And so I saw one reconstructed man in the good State of Georgia before I
left it. [Laughter and applause.]
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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