To forsake Letitia is to leave her and the children to starve. For how
could Luttrell support them all on a miserable pittance of five hundred
pounds a year? The idea is preposterous. It is the same old story over
again; the same now as it was four months ago, without alteration or
improvement; and, as she tells herself, will be the same four years
hence.
Whatever Luttrell himself may think upon the subject he keeps within
his breast, and for the first week of his stay is apparently supremely
happy.
Occasionally he speaks as though their marriage is a thing that sooner
or later must be consummated, and will not see that when he does so
Molly maintains either a dead silence or makes some disheartening
remark.
At last she can bear it no longer; and one day toward the close of his
"leave," when his sentiments appear to be particularly sanguine, she
makes up her mind to compel him to accept a release from what must be
an interminable waiting.
"How can we go on like this," she says, bursting into tears, "you
forever entreating, I forever denying? It breaks my heart, and is
unfair to you. Our engagement must end. It is for your sake I speak."
"You are too kind. Will you not let me judge what is best for my own
happiness?"
"No; because you are mad on this one matter."
"You wish to release me from my promise?"
"I do. For your own good."
"Then I will not be released. Because freedom would not lead to the
desired result."
"It would. It must. It is useless our going on so. I can never marry.
You see yourself I cannot. If you were rich, or if I were rich, why,
then----"
"If you were I would not marry you, in all probability."
"And why? Should I not be the same Molly then?" With a wan little
smile. "Well, if you were rich I would marry you gladly, because I know
your love for me is so great you would not feel my dear ones a burden.
But as it is--yes--yes--we must part."
"You can speak of it with admirable coolness," says he, rather
savagely. "After all, at the best of times your love for me was
lukewarm."
"Was it?" she says, and turns away from him hurt and offended.
"Is my love the thing of an hour," he goes on, angry with her and with
himself in that he has displeased her, "that you should talk of the
good to be derived from the sundering of our engagement? I wish to know
what it is you mean. Do you want to leave yourself free to marry a
richer man?"
"How you misjudge me?" she says, shrinking as if from a blow. "I shall
never marry. All I want to do is to leave you free to"--with a
sob--"to--choose whom you may."
"Very good. If it pleases you to think I am free, as you call it, be it
so. Our engagement is at an end. I may marry my mother's cook to-morrow
morning, if it so pleases me, without a dishonorable feeling. Is that
what you want? Are you satisfied now?"
"Yes." But she is crying bitterly as she says it.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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