Money for nothingWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Money for nothing
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Greed -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Swindlers and swindling -- Fiction
As when on a day of rain and storm there appears among the clouds a
tiny gleam of blue, so now, at those magic words "knock-out drops," did
there flicker into Mr. Molloy's sombre face a faint suggestion of hope.
"Don't you worry, Soapy. I've got this thing well in hand. When we've
gone you jump to the 'phone and get Chimp on the wire and tell him this
guy and I are on our way over. Tell him I'm bringing the kayo drops and
I'll slip them to him as soon as I arrive. Tell him to be sure to have
something to drink handy and to see that this bird gets a taste of it."
"I get you, pettie!" Mr. Molloy's manner was full of a sort of
awe-struck reverence, like that of some humble adherent of Napoleon
listening to his great leader outlining plans for a forthcoming
campaign; but nevertheless it was tinged with doubt. He had always
admired his wife's broad, spacious outlook, but she was apt sometimes,
he considered, in her fresh young enthusiasm, to overlook details.
"But, pettie," he said, "is this wise? Don't forget you're not in
Chicago now. I mean, supposing you do put this fellow to sleep, he's
going to wake up pretty soon, isn't he? And when he does won't he raise
an awful holler?"
"I've got that all fixed. I don't know what sort of staff Chimp keeps
over at that joint of his, but he's probably got assistants and all
like that. Well, you tell him to tell them that there's a young lady
coming over with a brother that wants looking after, and this brother
has got to be given a sleeping draught and locked away somewhere to
keep him from getting violent and doing somebody an injury. That'll get
him out of the way long enough for us to collect the stuff and clear
out. It's rapid action now, Soapy. Now that Chimp has gummed the game
by letting himself be seen we've got to move quick. We've got to make
our getaway to-day. So don't you go off wandering about the fields
picking daisies after I've gone. You stick round that 'phone, because
I'll be calling you before long. See?"
"Honey," said Mr. Molloy devoutly, "I always said you were the brains
of the firm, and I always will say it. I'd never have thought of a
thing like this myself in a million years."
IV
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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