Money for nothingWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Money for nothing
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Greed -- Fiction; Humorous stories; Swindlers and swindling -- Fiction
He had heard stories. In stories girls drew their breath in sharply and
said "Oh, why must you spoil everything like this?" He decided not to
spoil everything. Walking warily, he reached the little gate that led
to the boathouse steps and opened it with something of a flourish.
"Be careful," he said.
"What of?" said Pat. It seemed to John that she spoke a trifle flatly.
"These steps are rather tricky."
"Oh?" said Pat.
III
He followed her into the punt, oppressed once more by a feeling that
something had gone wrong with what should have been the most wonderful
night of his life. Girls are creatures of moods, and Pat seemed now
to have fallen into one of odd aloofness. She said nothing as he
pushed the boat out, and remained silent as it slid through the water
with a little tinkling ripple, bearing them into a world of stars and
coolness, where everything was still and the trees stood out against
the sky as if carved out of cardboard.
"Are you all right?" said John, at last.
"Splendid, thanks." Pat's mood seemed to have undergone another swift
change. Her voice was friendly again. She nestled into the cushions.
"This is luxury. Do you remember the old days when there was nothing
but the weed-boat?"
"They were pretty good days," said John wistfully.
"They were, rather," said Pat.
The spell of the summer night held them silent again. No sound
broke the stillness but the slap of tiny waves and the rhythmic dip
and splash of the paddle. Then with a dry flittering a bat wheeled
overhead, and out somewhere by the little island where the birds nested
something leaped noisily in the water. Pat raised her head.
"A pike?"
"Must have been."
Pat sat up and leaned forward.
"That would have excited Father," she said. "I know he's dying to get
out here and have another go at the pike. Johnnie, I do wish somebody
could do something to stop this absurd feud between him and Mr.
Carmody. It's too silly. I know Father would be all over Mr. Carmody if
only he would make some sort of advance. After all, he did behave very
badly. He might at least apologize."
John did not reply for a moment. He was thinking that whoever tried
to make his uncle apologize for anything had a whole-time job on his
hands. Obstinate was a mild word for the squire of Rudge. Pigs bowed
as he passed, and mules could have taken his correspondence course.
"Uncle Lester's a peculiar man," he said.
"But he might listen to you."
"He might," said John doubtfully.
"Well, will you try? Will you go to him and say that all Father wants
is for him to admit he was in the wrong? Good heavens! It isn't asking
much of a man to admit that when he's nearly murdered somebody."
"I'll try."
"Hugo says Mr. Carmody has gone off his head, but he can't have gone
far enough off not to be able to see that Father has a perfect right
to be offended at being grabbed round the waist and used as a dug-out
against dynamite explosions."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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