Detective and mystery stories; Murder -- Investigation -- Fiction
"Name? Jim Bulkins, sir. Bin boots at ''Ungry Man' fur two year'n more
come larst Easter. Two days back, gen'man--him upstair--come 'ere t'
stay. Come wi' couach fro' Winchester. Ony a bag--leather bag--very
light. Carried 't upstair fur gen'man, who 'ad thir'-seven. Gen'man
come 'bout five. 'Ad dinner, then wrote letter. Posted letter hisself.
Show'd 'im post orfice. Guv me sixpence; guv me t'other fur carr'in'
up bag. Seemed cheerful. Went t' bed 'bout nine. Nex' mornin' I went
upstair with butts. Gen'man arsked fur butts t' be givin pusonally t'
'im 'cause 'e were perticler 'bout polish. Knocked at door; n' anser.
Knocked agin; n' anser. Thought gen'man 'sleep, so pushed door to put
butts inside; door were open."
_Coroner_.--"What do you mean by the door being open?"
_Witness_.--"Weren't locked, sir; closed t' a bit--what you might call
ajar, sir. Entered room, put down butts; gen'man were lyin' quiet in
bed. Thought 'e were sleepin' an' come downstair. This were 'bout
nine. At ten went up agin. Knocked; n' anser. Knocked agin; n' anser.
Went into room agin; gen'man still sleepin'. Went to wake 'im an'
found 'e were ded. Sung out at onct, an' Mr. Chickles 'e come up."
_Juryman_ (sharp-nosed and inquisitive).--"How was he lying when you
saw him first?"
_Witness_.--"Bedclose up t' chin, sir. 'Ands and h'arms inside
bedclose; lyin' on back--bedclose smooth like. Know'd 'e were ded by
whiteness of 'is face--like chalk, sir--h'awful!"
_Coroner_.--"Are you sure deceased asked you to give him his boots
personally next morning?"
_Witness_.--"Yes, sir--said 'e were vury perticler."
_Coroner_.--"Did he seem to you like a man intending to make away with
himself?"
_Witness_.--"No, sir. Quite lively like. Sed as 'ow 'e were goin' to
look roun' this 'ole nex' day, sir."
_Coroner_ (pompously).--"And what did the deceased mean by the
expression 'this hole,' my man?"
_Witness_ (grinning).--"Jarlchester, sir."
Great indignation on the part of the patriotic jury at hearing their
native town thus described, and as Boots is still grinning, thinking
such remark to be an excellent joke, he is told sharply to stand down,
which he does with obvious relief.
The next witness called was Sampson Chickles, the landlord of the
"Hungry Man." A fat, portly individual is Mr. Chickles, with a round
red face, and a ponderous consciousness that he is the hero of the
hour--or rather the minute. "Swear Sampson Chickles!" Which is done by
a fussy clerk with a rapid gabble and a dingy Bible--open at
Revelations--and Mr. Chickles, being sworn to tell the truth and
nothing but the truth, gives his evidence in a fat voice coming
somewhere from the recesses of his rotund stomach.
"My name, gentlemen, is Sampson Chickles, and I've lived in
Jarlchester, man and boy, sixty years. But I keep my health wonderful,
gentlemen, saving a touch of the--"
_Coroner_.--"Will the witness kindly confine himself to the matter in
hand?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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